Look, this is just a blog.  I write with little regard for proper technique, or rules of grammar... i'm basically an untrained novice writer who started blogging as a form of therapy once the covid-era began, and my livelihood changed forever... i split up this web-site to have a section geared toward my political opinions and complaints, and another one for my philosophical and religious opinions, but this page is just the blog part... with that said--I write for my own mental-health, as history for my family, and for anyone else that cares to read... i like to consume information, process it for a bit, and regurgitate while connecting some useful patterns... and, i complain a lot, too... the Reader should understand that i'm a world-class complainer... respectfully yours, chris.

05-14-24: still sore from Friday, or was it Thursday? doesn't matter, turning a screw-driver for six-hours isn't something i can do without paying for it days afterwards, but man, i hate just sitting still... gotta exercise some of the skills every now and then, otherwise atrophy sets in. Sleeps been decent the past four nights, making up for the past three weeks of tossing n turning... i think the pain has been sneaking up on me again, and got bad enough that its messing with the sleep... it's so stupid that i even keep trying, but i'm assuming that the surgery will help with most of the remaining pain... the hip is still a bit weak, but i have a decent understanding of it's limitations now, same with the wrist... neither of them bug me very much in bed, but the shoulder... well that sucker is pretty constant in the day, and down-right chronic at night... the Doc. that did my hip last year is going over MRI/contrast results with me on Thursday, my shoulder/bone structure is prone to impingement, and i'm feeling a shit-ton of it these past five or six years... decades of tennis and other sports certainly aided to the deterioration, and bone-rubbing, or whatever it really is... decades of sport, exercise, playing with the kids certainly exasperated genetic pre-dispositions in my case, but doing the work of an electrical-apprentice (the guy who lifts all of the heavy shit so the electrician can do his work) beginning at 49 years old was the folly of all follies, i learned a ton in a pretty short time, but beat the crap out of my gimpy body... all three joints (hip/wrist/shoulder) wouldn't stop screaming at me, and never had enough time off to even try to repair... so, the shoulder issues is a big deal, the last of my big-three issues to dig into... Doctor Ben knows whats-up with it already do to my obvious bone structure shown by x-rays, but last week's MRI will tell him a bit more about what's going on in the ol' flapper; you know, soft-tissue and stuff... it's probably a stupid theory, but i've been operating under the theory that i should just keep using my shoulder trying to wrap-up a few physical projects that i want to finish years ago (the patio), and a few things maybe over at the church... the theory is to keep moving until he does the surgery, and my muscles won't be extra-weak before therapy begins... every Spring i hurt myself being a week-end warrior, trying to do a bunch of yard-work, and inevitably end up hurting myself for a few months

 05-12-24:  yeah man, Mother's Day... it's the day you show mama some love and attention, bless her, maybe spoil her a bit... my mom is still in a baggie which is inside of a clay pot on the TV-cabinet thing in the living room... thought i was going to sprinkle her today on the beach, but i didn't plan that one out, so she's still in the living room... I remember mom today because she passed two years ago on Mother's Day, so even though it's not the actual anniversary of her death by calendar date, i still see Mother's Day as the day to remember her role for all but 18 years of her life, and the day which she passed to whatever awaits... whether it's a promise of paradise, a spiritual form void of physical restrictions, basking in the glory of God, or whatever it might be... whatever it really is that awaits us, she went there on Mother's Day a couple of years ago, about four-thirty in the afternoon, and she had braids in her hair to finish things off, and to begin something new... Happy Mother's Day mama, Janice Ann Caddigan Terlizzi.  --  ct

 05-11-24:  as much as i despise many of the unethical studies and programs sponsored by DARPA, i gotta tell you that i'm crazy-impressed by the manta-drone... they are making under-water alien-vehicles, UFOs to some degree... it's shape screams of low-drag, can sustain crazy-long periods operating under the sea, and can carry a payload--and who knows what else it's capable of... OK, i don't mind my tax-money paying toward that sucker; i'm a US-taxpayer, therefore, one of the involuntary crowd-funders, but i'm OK with the fruits/results, this time... the manta looks sick, in the 1980's Boston sort of way, which means cool from the same period, which is the same as wicked, and all are the same thing as pissah... as far as i'm concerned, the Manta is wicked-pissah.  --  ct

 05-09-24:  still not writing much, it's past time to complain about the performance of this web-editing thing that i use, it's the vehicle/canvas that i use to write, i'll add that to my list of things to do... i suppose i could write in a local word-editor, and paste into this crummy platform, but it feels like i'm writing more authentically/live when i write directly from the web-thing.  i'm two days past the MRI, and the shoulder is still recovering from it, they must have sunk that needle for the dye deeeeeeeep within me... the technician warned me of the pain, but i assumed it would be of the everyday variety, not the WTF kind of pain, good grief man.  going to help a friend with some wiring issues today, meaning, teaching them how to do it, because my body is too gimpy to do much labor these days... i thought i was in pretty good shape, but i made the same mistake i do every Spring, once it's warm outside i live the 'weekend-warrior' life, and overdue it to the point where i hurt most of the Summer... yep, i'm totally that guy... every frickin year, it's hard learning your limitations when you haven't had to think of them for the first fifty years of life, but maybe i'll smarten-up, and be more mindful/aware of my actions/movement before i do anymore damage to the old dad-bod.  i spoke to a guy that was supposed to be helpful with Veteran's issues yesterday, instead he turned-out to be a fearful man that felt like he had to perform in some inauthentic way without fully articulating himself, other than the fear... it didn't seem like a fruitful endeavor, but at least i learned who not to go to for counsel... so i'm chalking it up to an exercise of patience with a touch of education.  The publisher is cranking along with pre-production stuff, it's awesome to see what professionals can do with my writing-style, and abomination of most rules of grammar... they are certainly earning their pay with my project, they got their hands full... next week i'll find out how much they charge for the recommended 'line-editing' service.  Seems like the process is moving along quickly, i wrote most of it at the end of Feb thru the end of Mar, and here we are in May, and it's cranking right along... with my budget it's an expensive endeavor, it's like i'm paying for the final product which also comes with a ton of education, and since the essay already helped a few people it's worth every penny... i pray that God will use that tool to help others in due time.  I don't love how busy May has been, and equally don't love how busy June looks to be either, but the shoulder surgery will certainly slow things down for me, just don't know when it will happen... i'll be a one-armed super gimp soon enough, with OTJ training of 'how to be a lefty' to boot, it'll be educational, and probably frustrating too... the right arm-pit is going to reek like a high-school athlete for a month or so.  OK, ready for the second cup of coffee, enjoy your Thursday.  --  ct