...if folks are curious enough about this website or about me as a person they might end up poking around and ending up here, reading some blog entries/posts, blog posts are where i write about most of the real things that are important to me, and about other things to, sometimes things that bother me for some reason, and i also write about other silly ego revealing things that nobody needs to waste their time reading... but mostly its where i write about things that i think are important somehow, i'm not a professional anything, so there will be ignorance written below, but i trust that the reader can discern the baby from the bathwater, i do hope to stimulate your noggin enough to do some of your own research using your own critical-reasoning... i write for my own health, and to my offspring/kids, and to anyone else that cares to read. --  ct

11-27-22:  my mom was born this day in 1950, her birthday occurred on Thanksgiving some years, that was pretty cool... and then she passed this year on Mother's Day, but that date won't occur on mother's day every year either... even if you forget the exact dates that she was born--or passed--if you remember her on thanksgiving and mother's day then you are pretty darn close... so is Mother's Day Mom's new 'birthday' now, is that how it works?... anyways, thinking of Mom on her old birthday, but for mom 'all things have become new' about six months ago.  --  ct

11-23-22: i'm sick of opining on certain political matters, but i'm glad to help in my limited capacity... venting political frustrations is just who i am, so i have to do that to some degree, but now i have some new direction/focus... starting to shift attention toward moving/relocating next year, looking for a quieter venue, will be closer to an aging family member that will probably start requiring more help in the near future too... there is this matter with the VA that i need to address, that sort of thing is a pain in the neck really, it's a bit of a chore too, but i started a process, and i need to see it through while i still live close to a VA hospital... i still have a memorial thing for my mom to plan, there might be a huge obstacle in my current plans, finding an affordable venue on mother's day... i don't know that we will have any loose-ends to tie-up before we move though, maybe visit with some different folks one more time, but i think i can stay pretty forward-thinking/focused now... relocating is a bit weird to contemplate really, but this really isn't a healthy environment for me, so when the youngest daughter graduates next spring/summer we will be free'd up to explore new places... so that's my focus now, my hobby of over-consuming world events and governing trends is going to take a back-burner for a bit... maybe i'll focus on some books again, it'd be good to finish some projects, juggling a bunch of them at the moment... anyways, backing away from political commentary, my apologies to the folks that have come to expect a conservative's perspective, i'll get mouthy for 2024 again, i'll also try to make more use of my 'non-partisan' section of the blog too, raging like an attack-dog is a bit therapeutic, but it's not a sustainable mind-set.  --  ct

11-21-22: doing much better, thanks... the flu got me pretty good this time, it's an effective--yet not 'preferred' weight-loss system, still trying to regain some decent gut-health, and energy level, feeling a bit worn-out and weak, but i was sucking eggs last week, current discomfort is nothing like last week's writhing... make's me wonder if this year's flu-shot would have covered the strain that i had the misfortune of hosting for what felt like a whole life-time... still not motivated to write much, i'm searching for more focus/direction actually, i read from a bunch of sources that cover a wide bunch of topics and i want to have at least one concentration... so it just got a bit easier to pay some bills, so that in itself eases some degree of anxiety, and frees-up some head-space, and especially that the mid-term elections are mostly behind us... observing the political war of words and acting-performances are not just nauseating, they can get the old blood-pressure up in a fuss, the latest is seeing what the DNC is going to try to cram through legislation before the end of the term, it's probably going to be anger-inciting when we learn what sorts of things/projects that we are funding by default through our income taxes, much of it is inspired by it's beneficiaries, aka. campaign contributors... so there will be some theatrics and outrage from some groups in the near future as new policies are voted on, and the methods used by certain groups to trigger the idiots/masses, that's our current political news cycle/state... got things to do today, already chipping away at the errands/chores list, first day that i feel like i have some energy after last-week's flu, so i'm thankful for some degree of healing/recovery and normalcy again... i've been a bit anxious in some preparations for the future, too many unknown variables to consider really, but we will probably be living at least a thousand miles away from here by this time next year, probably MO, still not sure what part though, but it will be nowhere close to a city, i require peace and a bit of separation--and it's only taken fifty-plus years to figure that out... we don't want to go full-throttle off-grid, but want to produce as much of our own food as possible on what-ever sized location we end-up, i think ten acres is a good minimum to consider, but i'd have to buy feed for some critters with the smaller sized parcels, goats ought to graze a bit, and i want as big of a greenhouse as possible, maybe even a second smaller one the photo-period plants that MO is cool with now after it's latest measure to legalize home-growers/hobbyists, anyhow, MO... i went to basic training and AIT training for a multi-month stretch in MO decades ago, and never wanted to look back at that land-locked place, who would have guessed that it's where we are probably headed to next, too weird... we had like a 'twenty year snow' fall the nasty winter i was stationed at 'fort lost-in-the-woods', so i know it can get pretty dang cold around there, not sure that it can be much worse than southern NH though, it's a little lower latitude... anyhow, we are in for a nasty heating season, the oil is expensive again, and the electricity is about to jump over seventy percent in december, and the house isn't any more insulated this year than it was decades/centuries ago, so i'll be complaining about rising energy costs in the days/weeks/months to come... alright, back to house work, the kitchen is a wreck. -- ct

11-16-22:  the flu symptoms got worse yesterday, since my body has been rejecting food since monday afternoon i think i'll use this germ-bug opportunity for a liquid-only fast, probably for another day or two more... most of the nasty aches have lessened since i've been able to hold down some anti-inflammatory meds, the weakness is the worse right now, i didn't even want to step-up on the scale to see how much weight i've lost, probably only five pounds, but i'll check later to confirm... i haven't felt this useless in quite awhile... had to cancel some appointments, wife had to take time off from work to drive youngest daughter to an appointment, and i'm not accomplishing anything more than taking-up oxygen and space... my shower was good, ten more minutes of hot water would have been great, but i feel a tad better after it... going back offline, not going to write much for another few days, still need to get my head right, it's too fuzzy to concentrate, a few days of good nutrition and hydration ought to help with that issue, but i still have another day or two of fasting to get to a nice meal... anyways, God bless you, and i truly hope that you are in better physical shape than i am right now, there's nothing fun about influenza, except saying it three times fast, it's a fun word.  --  ct

11-15-22: think i have a flu-bug (there is a variant as well as RSV going around at my wife's employer), the severity isn't too bad, but i ache and can't get comfortable or sleep, and can't hold down food, i cancelled everything yesterday and today... even the ginger-ale sat like a rock earlier today, the lemon-zinger tea with honey is good so far, trying some coffee now... also trying to work-out a few priority items to finish a few projects, but i might buy one more arma-lite lower and a glk before the impending 'assault weapons ban of 2022'... if you don't shoot then most guns are scary, and the  black one's look the scariest, but if you shoot then you know how much of a joy the versatile and soft-shooting semi-auto's are, and how easy they are on you shoulder... right now i've got three related projects going on, finishing a .308 upper-receiver, finishing a 5.56 receiver, finishing a .458 socom receiver, and finally a longer .300 blk receiver--there are a few other upper-receivers that i want to make too, but these are the one's that i have started... i already have the frames, but no barrels or bolts or optics/sights... but now, instead of chipping away at those receivers/builds piece by piece, i might shift a little bit of priority to purchasing another stripped lower-receiver (or two), and maybe the big glock as well, don't really want to spend any money on them right now, but the lowers are cheap enough, and then i need some magazines too because mags are in the current version of the ban as well... not sure how long the ban will go for, but i'd like to get enough of these related items for the rest of my life before it goes into effect... i'm also in very early stages of developing a new round to fire from the ar-10/m-5 sized receivers, but if the assault weapons ban goes into effect it'll probably be a futile endeavor, unless there is enough of a market of pre-existing owners/builders, you might cal it a novelty-sized round (.700), but it's more of a close-quarters anti-vehicle sort of purpose, the round will also successfully harvest most dinosaurs and all living land animals, and not that you 'fish' with guns, but it would also harvest whales too... i'm really hoping for a property with enough space for a decent backyard shooting range, building ARs and shooting are therapeutic hobbies, but DNCers from areas with high crime can't understand the joy that shooters get from honing skills and experimenting, so they want to end the sales of the most versatile and easy shooting firearms on the market... folks have to see it for the power grab that the ban really is, it's not just about stopping gun-violence--stopping violence is the general purpose of firearms, 'protection', hunting, and fun--the ban has more to do with softening American Citizens ability to defend themselves, their country/constitution, and to protect against over-reaching government (remember the whole european monarchy that we broke away from)... anyhow, i'm done venting about the assault weapons ban of 2022, it just really dampens my plans because i don't have the finances to buy the few more items that i want to get to live out the rest of my days, and to get for my offspring to enjoy as well, fvcking DNCers, i suppose they'll have to contend with the NRA, and the firearms industry, and concerned Americans before it all get's passed though, but my personal opinion is that it will pass, so stock-up while you still can--there are ton's of great deals going on right now--i think the firearms industry is trying to unload as much as they can until they cannot anymore... the bill doesn't even make provisions for Veterans--who the government basically forced to learn and shoot them--that in itself smells of nefarious intent... i didn't even want to look at another gun when i ETS'd from the Army, then about ten to fifteen years later i rediscovered the joy of shooting, and then building arma-lites--they are basically big-boy erector-sets that you customize, so i'm a bit opinionated about this topic (most other topics too i suppose)... so there, now i'm really done venting... and the coffee isn't sitting well in my digestive track either, i'm afraid that it was too soon to try the java, stupid flu.  --  ct

11-09-22: glad that the politicking is over for now, i had to fast from media/commercials, even writing... there is still plenty to complain about, and we are about to have electric energy increase over seventy-percent, home-heating 'oil' is up, it's basically diesel--which is at historic highs in it's own-right, the pain is coming, if i had a commuting job we'd be screwed, fortunately the wife works close-by... so i have plenty to complain about, much of it is the progressive warriors against foil-fuels that are demanding green policies and claiming that putin's border crisis is the reason that fuel costs are high, they have a huge problem recognizing the elephant in the room and deflecting blame to over-zealous attack on fossil and nuclear energy, there is obvious policy failures pandering to the greenie wing of their party and global network... so there is plenty to complain about... but i won't... i'm still a bit surprised by some recent news that will help with some financial obligations, it sucks that i'm partially broken--which is the reason, i shouldn't be surprised really, it's logical, but i have to 'see it to believe it', but i appreciate the recognition... i would have appreciated them not-losing my records back in the day, there is no reason why my records should be missing or protected... i want to complain about that for a second, but my records basically start from the date when i returned to colorado springs, so i don't know if they ever made it back from desert storm (i was attached to a different unit for ODS), or if my original records ever got back home and were destroyed in the st louis records warehouse fire, but when i requested my records on multiple occasions they don't include a few years worth of info, none of the major documents that travel with soldiers were complete, they involve the last few months of service only... so there, i'm done complaining now, i tend to think that my records never made it back from iraq, i was already stop-loss, then transferred to a unit that was attached to another unit, and blah Blah BLAH, so when i returned to colorado i had decided that i didn't want to re-enlist and just rode-out my last few months until i ETS'd at uncle-sam's earliest convenience, so who know's if my records ever made it back to colorado from the group out of OK that i was attached to, those Army son's of bitches were awfully peculiar with how clean we had to get the dump-truck in order to pass inspection to return it to the USA, so i would expect that my records would have been handled with similar care, so that's why i'm complaining... and if they ever made it so saint louis to have been burned as suggested, who know's, never will, it's not like i was special and had anything to hide, so there is no reason why it should be particularly hard to find old documents, mine don't tell you anything that i did for over three years, too funny--not really--a pain in the ass is more like it really... anyways, i'm done complaining of this missing files business... i'm appreciative of their findings and recognition, and still shocked that so many months accumulated to reach some conclusion, i've been partially broken for a bunch of years now, you appreciate the recognition... so now here's my next area of complaint, my retirement job was going to build limited quantity AR-fifteens, just enough per year to keep my hands busy on big-boy erector-sets, but not so many as to be a manufacturer, just a 4473 small-time tinkerer... OK, nice dream right, no, not all says the 'assault weapons ban' of 2022... so now my dreams of re-selling glocks and building ARs, and doing some transfers are looking like a pipe-dream now, i am sooo not happy about it either, i'd invest in buying some lowers if i had the capital, the biden's atf doesn't like glocks and ARs, and i'm offended by that, the folks sponsoring that bill ought to sit through harassment and micro-aggression training, it's not right man... i didn't start getting back into shooting until you could buy an AR with a simple background-check, it was after the 'assault weapons ban' had expired and not renewed for years already, and something about the wars in the middle-east that popularized the firearms, and then the shooting-sports industry with three-gun events really have given a culture to 'America's gun', and now they want to ban them again... talk about dashing a guy's dreams, maybe i'll just get a little farm to keep myself busy, the ARs and glocks would have been the icing on the cake... son's a bitches are breaking my heart though, but i do have an idea for an after-market part that might make the standard AR pass the assault weapon's criteria, it would basically interrupt the semi-auto cycle, my pro-second A friends will scold me for even suggesting such a thing as a way of caving-in... but you can still have a totally cool AR that has a few modifications for states that don't like them, my idea interrupt's the full cycle, it's fine for plinking, not practical for competing or self-defense though, timing is critical to both competition and self-defense... anyhow, maybe i have a new hobby to keep me busy now, a semi-auto interruptorerer, because i think the ban is inevitable, it's one more thing that world government doesn't like, they don't like a well-armed militia, that's strictly an American thing now, it's too bad really, you have no idea how practical AR's are, and how easy they are to shoot, the recoil system takes the bite out of the impact to your shoulder, i really appreciate that at my age, my shoulder is pretty gimpy, so i think it will be a shame if i can't pass on the joy of ARs to my grandkids... i can't believe those son's of bitches are going to ban ARs again, they simply can't afford to buy mine back either, i don't build crap, i build the nice one's... disappointed in the assault weapons ban that's been proposed and moved along already, shattered my dreams of a fun hobby-job, some guys tie more flies when they get older, i like ARs and shooting, and was looking forward to doing that more in the future, i need a bolt gun for bigger game at some point anyhow, but now i want to prioritize one or two more sixteen-inch all-arounder type of builds, and finish a couple of other uppers that i have going on, a 458, a 308, and a pinned 14.5, i want to build another dedicated 22 lr 'pistol' too, those are fun to shoot close distances, maybe a 9-inch barrel, and it's always good to have a spare sixteen-inch around for a friend on the range... really hoping to find a place with space to shoot without breaking any laws or putting anyone in danger, and far enough away from small animals to not traumatize them, got to have a shooting range, two-hundred yards is good, three hundred is better, where i can enjoy shooting my ARs away from folks that are scared of them... right now my 308 bolt gun is my only real hunting rifle, a little mossberg woods gun, but i'd love to be able to use an AR variant for legal harvest game (hello 458 socom)... so the new weapons ban is giving me a bit of a head-ache, i don't have the money to prioritize more ARs right now, but they seem to be fading away... building ARs is like part of my identity, those son's a bitches, they are breaking my heart with this, my kids and their kids will get to enjoy them, but they probably won't be able to purchase their own, and a bunch of other folks are going to be missing-out on the beauty of America's Rifle, it's a damn shame really, even my cousin who lost a close friend to gunfire was willing to go to a range with me to learn to shoot at paper with an AR, you have no idea how much fun they are until you try them, you got to get the interactive targets too, the steel ones that self-set and make that 'ba-ting' sound are good... is that really asking too much, a little land to do that... OK, i'm done complaining for today, stupid assault weapons ban, it really put's a damper on my future, AR-building was going to be my tinkering job when i retired, son's of bitches... ranting is over, time to focus on dinner, pasta and meatballs tonight.  --  ct

11-07-22:  tomorrow we vote, there's nothing else that i have to do but for one of my civic duties... throw the bums out, bring in some new smart folks that will cooperate with our constitution and style of government, and aren't compromised already, and aren't out looking to get the benefits that come with compromise... is that too much to ask from a politician?  Maybe, but maybe in another generation or two we will have a class of independent intelligent and uncompromised leaders to help get our country back on track, most unbiased folks say it will get worse before things get any better, diesel shortage won't help, you know that stuff is what oil-based homes heat with, and it's early autumn and the heat is already been on, and electric costs are going up over seventy percent from our supplier... praying for a generation of uncompromised politicians... anyways, getting a few broken body parts worked-on today, electrodes and frequencies and tens devices with medicine... it's shaping-up to be a brilliant afternoon, windows down and some music on kind of day in rockingham county.  --  ct

11-07-22 later:  and another thing, i don't get why so many viewers lately, it's like i stop writing for a bit and then a bunch of folks decide to poke around during the same week... pretty weird, i'm too boring for the number of viewers.  --  ct

11-06-22:  this batch of chili is pretty good, nothing fancy to kick-off the season, just good americanized-chili, and rice too of course, it made three gallons according to the dozen mason-jars used to can it all... got to check on the rice  --  ct

11-05-22:  i'll probably work on a political thing this week, the republicans have the mid-terms secured, they can't even shoot them-selves in their own feet if they tried, but might as well try to hone my craft (fourth-grade level as expected by certain federal standards)... but with political stuff aside for a moment, i've got to deal with a dozen--or so--maple trees worth of foliage to wrestle with, the weather is perfect right now, it's too difficult to find complaint, most bills are paid, looking forward to the future, to moving to a quieter and more simple setting (the wife and i search for a 'walnut grove'), Main St just isn't good for my soul/nerves... made the first batch of seasonal chili, three-gallons worth of meaty and tangy americanized-chili goodness worthy of any chip or hot-dog, that's some good chili right there, yes sir... praying for a few friends, i won't bore you with the details, but please keep some folks that are struggling in your own prayers, if you've ever gone through a shit-storm then you can identify

11-03-22:  so they say that i'm seventy-percent broken now, maybe that's about right, the frustrating thing is that i'm still pretty capable of doing lot's things pretty well, i just don't recover quickly, i can still have a bit of fun exercising in nature--but i pay for it, sometimes for months... sometimes i feel perfectly fine, but most of the time some old injury or joint is causing some grief to some extent or another... anyhow, i appreciate the consideration and judgement, and commitment, etc... i might be able to focus more time on writing now... i'll have two small books out this year, and a third possibly too, whether or not they generate any income remains to be seen, but they will be done, projects closed... i haven't written for hire at all, i'm probably too crude and niche to freelance, but i've certainly offered free political material for the past couple of years, but nothing for hire, so still considered unemployed/self-employed, and the 'self' employed is almost non-existent, sporadic at best... i can't work for vaccine mandate companies, so that eliminates a bunch of remote-work that i should otherwise be able to do, that sucks, i should at least be able to do some customer-service, nope.

11-02-22: back online... had a weird few days... had to get on a payment-plan with the electric company, as we owed them for a few months now--also had cable/internet/phone service shut off for a few days waiting out for payday... then i received notification of a benefit which helped get those caught-up, plus a few other things that needed immediate attention, basically... if you are an American Tax-payer, i salute you, and i appreciate your contribution and help, i used your money wisely and not for frivolous things. -- ct