01-30-2021: Never got to the recruiters yesterday, car broke while pulling out of our driveway, life never gets dull.  Its much too cold to work on a control arm and all of the things attached to it outside in NH this weekend so will have local repair shop work on it early next week, and recruiter is coming to our place on Monday to wrap up the legal stuff, life continues with or without modern conveniences to help along the way.

01-29-2021: kids were great, we did not crush the school work, but we survived and maybe 75% of school work done, not bad for first time.  Kids are both funny and smart and communicate quite differently, you know, like individuals, nice family.  Heading to recruiters office in a few, signing my 'boy' away to the USMC tonight, and next week he raises his hand and makes the same pledge that I did about 194 years ago, 34 actually... i still think he should have went ARMY, but whatever, he knows there is something bigger than himself that he wants to pursue, so he is and i'm crazy proud.

01-28-2021 even later: I'll be helping a family with two school aged children that are remote education for three days a week, remote learning is crazy important but has become a formidable challenge to many american families with two working parents... their former 'tutor' had apparently become too involved in her own school work when her semester began and forgotten about prioritizing the children with assistance... and left them with no warning up and quit the other day, left them hanging, so it is what it is and now i'll kelp two kids with their remote school work, least expected short term job ever but kids are worth helping, hopefully i can bridge the gap while they find a pro, the kids seem great and a cute dog to help watch the kids too.  I'm psyched, we'll crush school work together.

01-28-2021 later: fixed the power... i am disappointed in the person that installed most of the outlets during the last update to this house. 
I also wanted to mention that as I have been venting about some topics that are considered controversial subjects it's important to know that its the reason why I won't be a 501c or whatever the real thing is, the organizations that are non-profit and have tax-exempt status cannot be blunt about politics and the phonies that have been getting america and other parts of the world emotionally stirred-up, I can't say my honest opinion of a person that is running for any type of 'office' or 'position' if it is considered on behalf of the organization... since everything that i write is on 'behalf of this organization' i won't ever be one of those charities that people can write off their donations, i don't want support from folks that are concerned about their income tax obligations, that's another reason why i suggest only donating a dollar if anything at all... then... if you are still interested in claiming your $1 donation as an income tax deduction you will have to bear that burden yourself because i cannot offer sound advice for the distress you may be feeling. -- ct

01-28-2021: Going to try to fix the faulty electric problem in mt daughters bedroom, wish me luck. -- ct

01-27-2021 later: I have not written anything intensive or professional to the point of accumulating any of my thoughts into a book sized/worthy reading, but I have a couple in the works and any books or articles or help that I can provide will always be free of charge, I am the reason that illogical people do not become rich, I'm about dumber than a box of rocks if my intentions are to chase after illogical items, man I might be dumb... but my point is that my article titled christianity 101 is a perspective based on my interpretation of the teachings of jesus of nazareth, its my opinion, it's not a comprehensive article.  I think that if people want to know more beyond what i've written they will find the clunky link that you can send a question or harassing statement to.  I have met many different looking, dressing, communicating, thinking, smelling, did i already say dressing, and i have met many of those different types of people in many different age groups and poverty levels and education levels and i will never write perfectly to any one person but I ask everyone to assume that the stereotype and quick opinion that you formed of a stranger, unless that stranger posed an obvious threat, assume that your assumption of that person is probably wrong and that they are worth the time and effort to knock off your opinionated ass and give them your undivided attention, at least long enough to be not be an ignorant ass fool and form a lazy ass opinion... be willing to assume that you are wrong about 'most people', but if you recognize that they are a threat you need to react on your instinct, otherwise, quit your lazy hasty opinion and assume that the other person that you are communicating with is correct about 66% percent of their opinion on life and you might only understand 33% of what is actually going on around you... would truth in that educated opinion kind of suck, well it should because its the truth and it hurts people that are too shallow to admit their faults and probably feel like im attacking them, but people with a more healthy perspective might think, 'no shit, why is what he is writing even worth the effort to produce'.  I do not write to the people with the smallest percentage of being most similar to me and most able to profit from because im not that smart or shallow, i try to write to the people in other countries and places that i have visited, to the kids that ive met and to my own kids, i dont try to profit from writing, i just write because i have to for now, and partly for my kids too, and partly for anyone else that reads.  My apologies for all of the political references, they will probably end shortly as my blood pressure comes back down from the politically charged year of 2020, I so want to put that year to rest.-- ct

01-27-2021: I mention my personal opinion of a somewhat 'popular' world religious philosophy and analytics are exponential in my opinion, good, communication and dialog are important.  I find myself still 'apologizing' in some respects for misconceptions about a large part of u.s. that has been manipulatively opposed to by too many other americans and I want to puke, and there is still way too much anger and confusion and manipulation by politicians that have too much focus on the power and fame and fortune that can come from selling out their integrity for selfish ambition... I hate that stuff to the point that I have to write about it because otherwise it bugs me too much, I can't change any of the 'problems' that I think I see in other people because I'm probably half of the problem myself... so I have to puke-up my opinions and frustrations to anyone that wants to read, I'm a big mess sometimes and lots of other people are too is my idea for the night.  -- christopher

01-26-2021: I just puked in my mouth ... a little bit.  The trigger of my puke is watching president biden attempt to fight his way through sharing his ideas/rationale for the nonsense that he is attempting to communicate.  If you require teleprompter to simply share your thoughts it tells me that you do not believe what you are saying, or too confused and distracted to do a very basic human thing... communicate.  If your ideas are over complicating and rationalizing the dysfunction of your primary constituents and you require their illogical input to make their case, OK, I get it.  But if you can't keep your train of thought because of your failing brain/memory it saddens me to watch a physically/mentally unfit/worn out person attempt to carry on as usual.  If you can't keep your train of thought because you have a compromised ego and the bull shit that you are communicating is nonsensical to the point of confusion, thus relying on the teleprompter... well yeah, I get it.  Who knows why he requires teleprompters but to me it tells me you are either mentally unfit due to failing/aging brain, or are just plain spewing nonsense that you know is wrong ... hopefully I'm wrong.

01-25-2021: Anytime you have any argument, or fight with someone you love you owe it to the both of you to write-up an after action report, at least that's what the army called them a bunch of years ago.  If something of any significance happened the squad leader or other person in leadership would write a report that gave relevant details of the incident.  I had a minor blow out with Laura today, and it was over the most unimportant thing in the world, but an argument happens because of each individuals perception of the incident.  An after actions report is too formal for non military types, but after an argument don't settle for both of you remaining upset, and not wanting to talk about it... hello unresolved issues and further relationship strain... how about taking the time to figure out what triggered yours or both of ya's emotions.  For me it was compounded frustrations, and at least one of those frustrations was the completely unimportant thing that I felt comfortable with blaming on the old lady... so stupid, I'm thankful she actually loves me.  Compounded frustrations you ask... yeah, she got the wrong type of beans for my chili, divorce material right, no, not really, but my frustration with her was over the fact that after I discovered the huge beans that my picky eating kids would not appreciate I grabbed the cover for the pot that the chili was simmering in and the dang lid was dirty, not clean , but dirty... no one will ever know who put the dirty glass lid back where the clean ones go but when it happens 30 seconds after you realize that your loving wife mistakenly bought the big ass beans, well then it makes a big difference... it makes a bigger difference when the kitchen sink that you want to put the dirty lid in is still full of dirty dishes that you asked the wife to delegate the chore yesterday and you can't even fit the filthy lid in the dang sink... this is full-on battle mode... so stupid, so unimportant, just a bunch of back to back to back frustrations equate to me being a big dummy, I'm so glad I married someone that loves me and values the same things that I do... otherwise we could be divorcing over a dang dirty lid.

01-23-2021 pm: Analytics, in my case it's just a tool that shows me 'how many individual users have visited this website', 'how many sessions', or times those users come back to read more, and then 'how many pages they visited'.  I purposely do not advertise, or allow 'followers', or display user statistics stating how many people have viewed any of the pages on this website.  What current analytics tell me is that in the 2 weeks this website has been online considerably more people have visited this boring website than anticipated... so it's not just my mom anymore, and that most of the people that have viewed anything have come back for more, and that those people have viewed multiple pages each session, it doesn't tell me who, or what pages, but it does tell me that there is an audience for a crappy arranged boring website if it contains truth and genuineness, so thank you, I'm, blown away... and no, I did not 'tag' some of the famous people that I wrote about, it is what it is as some weird people (me) say.

01-23-2021: Now I know why I like the country singer chris stapleton.  I have no business being a 'country music fan', I grew up outside of boston, ma during a time where most of my persuasive family, friends, and radio stations were saying that rock n roll was the way to go.  Life changes, and generally speaking people do to, and with the help of my wife and sister in-law I began to listen to and enjoy much of what I listened to regarding country music.  I remember a guy in the army trying to explain to me, a young rock n roller, that country music was three chords and the truth, it was a definition given by a country music legend harlan howard, but it didn't mean a dang thing to me until maybe 5 years ago.  In general my understanding of music is that it is an artistic communication of sounds.  Artists may use musical instruments or vocalization or both to try to communication to listeners, but so far it's still sound.  Sometimes when I listen to music that is instrumental only I recognize that music could be variations of timing and fluctuations of tone and repeated melody that make up a song that I like.  Sometimes when I listen to music that is vocal only I understand that the sound that the person is making is essentially the song, and other times I think that it's the words that the person was communicating is the actual song.  Sometimes a song can be a combination of meaningful instrumental sounds with meaningful vocals but the words are crap, and other times they can be combination of good instruments and good words but the vocal signing is crappy, other times I like the vocals and words but the musician isn't a gifted user of instruments.  Sometimes two out of the three things are good enough to cancel out the deficient talent and you still have what many people think is a good 'popular' song.  Sometimes a musician has the ability to communicate a message through sound that not only includes exceptional instrumental, exceptional words, and exceptional vocals that combine into a song that is not only popular but they exhibit greatness in the way they come together to communicate a simple message to the listener that leaves the listener 'blown away', or speechless, or scratching their heads at what they just heard.  My opinion of chris stapelton is that he doesn't go overboard with complex lyrics, he keeps his words somewhat 'simple' to a point, but they are still meaningful, but then that's where the 'simple' stops and greatness of instrument and vocals leave me speechless.  I've enjoyed his music over the past 10 years or so whether it be recorded by him, or whether he wrote the music for another musician to record, but I've appreciated his work for a while now, but now I know why I like him.  When I listened to his song, which is co-recorded with his wife morgane, titled 'starting over' the way that I felt after listening to it made me want to research a bit more about him and now I know why I like that guy.  It's not just his music, it's his image, his ego, his charisma, his theatrical extravagance of his performances, no ... no I'm lying, no, it's none of those things actually, it's actually the absence of those things that I admire which tells me that he is as genuine as the music that he communicates to me.