...if folks are curious enough about this website or about me as a person they might end up poking around and ending up here, reading some blog entries/posts, blog posts are where i write about most of the real things that are important to me, and about other things to, sometimes things that bother me for some reason, and i also write about other silly ego revealing things that nobody needs to waste their time reading... but mostly its where i write about things that i think are important somehow, i'm not a professional anything, so there will be ignorance written below, but i trust that the reader can discern the baby from the bathwater, i do hope to stimulate your noggin enough to do some of your own research using your own critical-reasoning... i write for my own health, and to my offspring/kids, and to anyone else that cares to read. --  ct

02-28-22:  the last day of february, it's supposed to be a cold one, too... i went to bed around 22:30 and woke by 01:30, and that was with a sleep aid too... i don't think i need to do anything that doesn't require my A-game today, other than some driving for a few periods of time, so i think today will be fine without the sleep... this is similar insomnia that i deal with at least a couple of times per week, and when i used to work full time it really sucked, productivity diminishes when we don't have adequate food, water, sleep, air... when we don't meet our physiological needs it has a domino-effect that spills over to many areas of our lives, including professional productivity... the sleep Really screws with my concentration ability, it's impairment with the drugs or alcohol... anyways, there will be coffee at some points throughout the day, hopefully i limit it and actually drink plenty of water too... i'm really glad that i'm not sitting in an office all day today, the head would be bouncing off the keyboard for sure, and the drive home probably wouldn't be all that safe either.  --  ct

02-28-22 later:  so i finally watched president Trump's keynote from this year's CPAC... i should be upfront, and state that although i voted for him a couple of times i really stopped watching most of his addresses because of his propensity to play the crowd and give in to platform theatrics, and cheer-leading, so to speak... the DNC types are brilliant at theatrical incitement, and when the folks that i like do the same thing then i start to tune-out... i'd rather read accurate full text than watch the theatrics, it's too easy to get distracted by entertaining theatrics like some of the dog and pony show's that some of the drama queens on the left always resort to, Schumer is a great example of a drama queen, Schiff is too, but he's closer to the edge of psychopathy/possession than straight drama like Schumer

02-27-22: just finished reading the full text of putin's speech from last week 02-21-22, i really appreciated the link, as well as the logical suggestion that reading the speech would be a good place to start answering some of my questions and curiosity... i like to remain as independent as possible, but it seems that even independent people find value in relationships, relationships are necessary in life, relationships teach us much about life/reality, some relationships are great, and others sap the life and energy out of us, some relationships are with individuals (unique identifiers), and some are with groups of people (table), and some are with groups of groups (databases), and some are with full-blown 'networks' containing multiple databases (internet)... group relationships can be healthy and joyous and satisfying, but groups can also be quite strange... some groups are decent like-minded folks that live their lives according to the two most important commandments, their words and actions and lifestyles suggest as much... some groups come with much more than you might bargain for, especially if they are a part of larger networks, sometimes you have to be careful in/of your curiosity, secretive shit will exemplify/identify such groups... some groups might prove themselves as time-wasters, if they deceive and exploit and manipulate, although you might gain valuable life experience/education that's useful for future discernment, people learn lot's of lessons the hard way when we lose time and money and realized we were getting played... some groups network for the sole purpose of commerce, 'maybe we can help each other' sort of thing, be wary of such networks, some folks don't play by the 'love your neighbor as yourself' commandment, instead they opt for the 'whoever has all of the gold makes the rules' type of 'golden rule', some folks sold their souls for a fat wallet and networking for ego-run-wild power and prestige, be wary of those sorts of folks/groups, some have no problem showing the way straight to hell... some groups network for the sole purpose of meaningful things and not just egocentric or geocentric things, those are decent groups to associate with... a group that i'm associated with is looking at a good curriculum that is helpful and meaningful... one of the current topics is 'relationships', and so it got me thinking about the stuff that i just finished writing :-)  --  ct

02-27-22 later:  so i looked over the curriculum and answered the questions regarding 'relational-self', i filled in the three questions, but all of the answers seem to point back to God and Self... i wrote down the primary, secondary, and tertiary concerns, but it seems to me that external relationships are dependent on a healthy understanding of God first, and understanding ourselves too, and then extends to others in a healthy manner... it seems like God, Self, Others are all required to better asses the first three questions, but maybe that's what the three questions are eluding to... i dunno, but i did my homework  --  ct

02-26-22: yesterday was dark and snowy and windy, today is clear and sunny and every bit as cold... i think i like today better than yesterday though... i've been reading through James yesterday and again today, the book covers a ton of biblical 'principles/concepts'... there was a seminary that was advertising on FB for a free course on James so it perked my curiosity, i never looked into the course requirements, but i assume that the course material wasn't free... i've recently seen a friend hold-up a book that expands on james and it's huge, it's big enough to dispatch many mammals, that's a LOT of info, and i don't know that i want to read another encyclopedia at this moment in time, two-three hundred pages fine, maybe, but some of these > 600 page things are a huge commitment, maybe they are worth it, just not with my budget... so the regular old james found in the bible is a solid book that i haven't poked around in for a bit, glad i read through it again, i really like the epistles, they offer tons of practical do's and dont's... i'm currently working on reading through two large books, a ton of websites, and juggling a few different writing projects, as well as this blog thingy, and another course too... i couldn't have handled a quarter of that processing capability a couple of years ago... what's changed between then and now? weened-off of five different medications, you have no idea what sorts of impairments some of those things yield... also had life turned upside-down thanks in part to stupid fvcking shithead's reactions to a genetically enhanced virus that spread throughout the developed world, and then the no job thing (that can really screw with a man's self-perception and utility), limited income, remote learning kids... i'm sure there were other factors as well, but whatever you want to call what happened to me i'm simply going to call it 'god's mercy'... i look at trials as growing opportunities (compromised predatory egos look at trials as opportunities to advance their causes and manipulate non-networked regular people), but i see trials as god offering us an opportunity to look at some things in life differently, a period of possible correction and possible maturity and new priorities and understanding... i could keep blaming everyone under god's great sun about the difficulties and challenges that i've been facing without ever looking in the mirror... i think that's where the suicide temptation comes into play for some folks, in some respects it's the ultimate way of trying to control an outcome of events that we can't seem to figure out how to control, maybe we look at ourselves as a worthless empty shell, maybe we look at ourselves as a primary obstacle to a bunch of problems, maybe we just give-up and quit fighting, maybe we don't appreciate the notion of an afterlife and so we use it as a logical solution to solve a 'problem', i dunno really, but trials and hurdles and obstacles are guaranteed in life, some seem to get more than our fare-share of trials in life... knowing what sorts of help we need, and how to articulate those needs, and who to present the needs to seems to be a part of that growing and cycle of evolution (and praying), the suicide thing seems to be illogical in many respects, maybe it's even illogical in every respect... but how we react to trials of various types has much to do with our interpretation of our creator and ourselves and how to move forward... i'm quite thankful for god's mercy, and that 'he corrects' his children, and uses circumstances and events and misunderstanding's to help steer-us along the straight and narrow... trials can be exceedingly fruitful, or they can be a kick in the balls that puts us over the edge... i would say that this trial that's been going on since hillary versus trump has been helpful in teaching me how to slow my thoughts down a bit, and to articulate my perceptions a bit better, and understanding certain things that i actually need help with, and which things i just need to take another look at to move forward... i've also learned that i'm not good for long-term physical labor anymore, maybe to some degree for a season or two, but not as a profession, i'm getting a bit old, and the body doesn't recover as it once used to... i appreciate trials even though i want to curse the world for them sometimes, there is an element of god's mercy in such seasons of our lives... anyways, James is a good read, it's only five chapters but it covers a bunch of biblical, or 'christian' principles and truths of god's reality, but like much of what logos offers, only those with ears to hear will listen, and only those with eyes to see will absorb the truths found within... give james a read if you are looking for something good to consume, just like any book in the bible you should have a bit of the understanding of the person who authored it, and the audience that they wrote it to, but the best truths are principles that don't matter much on the author or audience, they are just pure fact/reality that penetrates the soul of the reader... give james a read, it won't disappoint, but if you don't believe in an actual and personal god then good fvcking luck trying to read anything in the bible, good luck mate. -- ct

02-25-22: i've already been outside and moved about four or five inches of snow from the autos and the driveway and walkway... that was a few hours ago, now there is plenty more new snowfall to deal with... i don't care for the winter season very much, but hey, it's life/reality... shifting gears here... when writing about the great reset and the manipulative practices and policies enacted by globalists is quite fun, one particular organization posts most of their motives online for the whole world to see, but 'the world' seems to be 'just hoping' that folks in important jobs and clubs are doing 'the right things' to fix some real/actual problems, instead of the contrived narratives and real problems that many demographics and individuals deal with... when you are rich and have endless resources you can sit around and theorize all day long without your actions hitting your own wallet/piggy-bank/portfolio, that's a bit of what's going on with networked elites... one funny thing is that i expect some push-back when elites that choose what to control decide that they don't care for my perspectives, the hacking attempts and certain types of surveillance is just a part of that reality... but today i had one of the social-class semi-retarded imbeciles try to do that manipulative 'cancel-culture' tactic of discrediting me and exercising my own critical-thinking ability, it's a bit like a retarded person calling an average-IQ person 'retarded', in many respects; the tactic is almost hilarious, but the source of the criticism is a sports-class social-maniac whose primary income is directly from the pharma industry to be a good little asset, go figure... he actually thinks that he was inoculated with a vaccine... HAAAAAAH HAAAA HAAA HAA HA... anyways, it's always wise to consider criticism, sometimes criticism is correct, sometimes there is baby in the bathwater, but when you recognize the manipulation tactics used by little children that are learning to communicate then you have to measure that against the source of the criticism... cancel-culture techniques are effective to try to shut people up and discredit them, but it's only as effective as the cognition-level and attention-span of the audience, which is why facey-book seems to be so effective in social and policy manipulation... anyways, good talk... and if you are curious about the writing project that i'm working on then you can start by looking at the interactive diagram at this link, and when you consider the way that influencers and policy-makers use concerted narratives to manipulate desired outcome then you might start connecting some dots on your own... you might also like the book or movie when it's done... i'm sure that some smarter folks are already working on their version of the story, but i'm taking a crack at it anyways... the great reset, and the steps taken to get us to that point is the story of our time... writing is fun, you must try it sometime. -- ct

02-25-22 later: so i'm recalling listening to other people's perspectives and insight and observations and opinions over the past twenty or thirty years or so, and i look at different periods of my life, and then who some important influencers were during those times... if i were try to recall the full list of influencers both positive and negative then list would fill a scroll, but there was a stage in my life where i was in a few groups of folks that included a few doctors, a few professors and other educators, and some other folks too that had a heart for god and to serve god in some capacity or another, i learned a bunch from all of those folks, i didn't learn a TON from each one of them, the bio-chemist was in a class of his own but he was also brilliant at explaining theory when he spoke about work stuff... but most of those folks had various understandings and interpretations of god and certain aspects of god, but they were all so very close to believing and agreeing on the same thing... some of them could argue until blue in the face about certain 'do's and don'ts' of christian religion, and sometimes even things like 'those folks are heretics for even suggesting that the body is this and the bread is that and what's the wine even about'... oh yeah, i've been around plenty of folks that appreciate meta-physics, and that weigh much of their decision-making and actions based on the two most important of the ten commandments, man, do i appreciate folks like that... and at the same time that i tell you that i will also kindly tell you that i fvcking hate wolves and predators that lie and deceive, that's one of the reasons that i felt motivated to begin writing... there are a million different ways to manipulate folks including distorting facts and controlling information, and i thought i had seen them all, but never to the extent that i witnessed during the trump era, and the covid era... it was enough to wake me up a bit and snap me back into the reality that wolves and predators exist among our population, but they look like regular people... some kill, steal, and destroy, and others are more like 'orwellian blackwhites' that work for media and communications and have sponsors to answer to, and then other networks that they are also associated with, and the groups and industries that they support, and the words and rhetoric they use to communicate, and their network's actions and behaviors... so i don't really sympathize with either types of predators, i don't like thugs that prey on sheep, and i don't like manipulators that prey on sheep... and some of those types get under my skin like nobody's business... i don't know how any of those professional smart people that i used to spend meaningful and purposeful time with would think of my perspectives and writing style and methods of expression that i use, but i think most would tell you that i have a heart for god, and tried to serve him as best as i could at the time that we spent time together, i think some of them would also tell you that they knew i was troubled in some sense for a time, but didn't know how to really help... i can tell you that i'm feeling much better now, and seeing more clearly than ever before, despite my reading glasses... you can choose to think that i was the token fool that they were stuck with, or you might consider that we all learned from one another pretty well... anyhow, it was interesting to read the words of a manipulative fool today, it was a bit disappointing too, because i considered them a loved-one, but you live and you learn and sometimes you have to face reality and the fact that fools live among us just as predators do, sometimes fools dress like the jester, sometimes they try to distort reality and manipulate sheep, and other times they just prioritize social-dependencies and repeat brain-washed narratives... but i expected some more push-back, i posted a bunch of things poking at a bunch of chests over the past few days, and brainwashed blackwhite zombies are starting to respond, what did i expect, life comes filled with disappointments, it's all part of the package-plan, disappointments are as real as life and death, you ever hear the phrase that 'you don't really want to meet your heroes', sometimes it's because they are sell-out actors that were playing a role, and douche-bag predators for being so deceptive and persuasive for a penny or two... anyways, today was pretty cool, i had to shovel a bunch of snow, but i got to read and write a bunch, and had some quiet time to do some thinking in between most of that, the little things that i find pleasure in as i get older are too weird, but i appreciate the time to do them. -- ct

02-24-22:  today's free-time will be spent with paper and pencil and modifying some recently printed diagrams, and expanding lists of variables for soot, i was reminded of another good web-page for some context, corey's digs... i also downloaded an unrelated book that i thought i was going to have to pay for, sometimes authors make their works available for free on non-commerce websites, i'm glad that i found it, and that the author isn't a money-driven elite that hold's their works and egos tightly and secretively, so i'll be reading a bit more on cannabinoids and the endo-cannabinoid system as they relate to endocrinology when time and priorities permit.  --  ct

02-22-22:  i read an article written by J. Rappoport, it was pretty well articulated, and i appreciated his perspectives and insight regarding the WEF puppets of Klaus Schwab... that Schwab feller is bad news... here's a quote from C. Langan regarding his perspective and overview of some folks like Schwab and some of his coherts:

... well stated, right... so when i try to tell a story 'soot' there must be a schwab character, there simply must be... the question is how will i describe the character, what will be the traits and adjectives assigned to him, time will tell, but i have some ideas, and they certainly don't paint the predator in a flattering manner, you'll see.... telling the story of our time must include some obvious members of the elite ruling class, it simply must.  --  ct

02-21-22: today i'm thinking about how a few stories and theories that sometimes merge together to tell a bigger story sometimes, or how additional insight can be helpful in understanding something better, more complete, or illogical, nonsensical, and fantastical... i'm thinking about some recent conversations, and then some recent things that i've read more recently, some of the things that i've read and listened to recently speak to some of C. Langan's theories, and his TOE, and how they expand on religiousy matters, and in this case i recall him discussing some facets of 'reality' using words and terms like self-simulation, sometimes he uses words like self-correction, and free-will, he talks about physics a bit too... and it seems that 'resistance' is something that has to do with many facets of our lives, and so when you consider some of those things together you might end-up with something that sounds like a what many christians call 'trials'... in some respects the christian theory that trials are sort of like 'life's hurdles', they are natural parts of the human life/death and human evolution/devolution cycles, where we meet various intensities and types of resistance/stressors and otherwise unfortunate and shitty circumstances... we hit new challenges, different and weird obstacles, we face emotionally difficult or painful experiences that we can't simply change on our own, our 'faith' and logic seems to be challenged, things don't add up and compute and make sense and there is no 'equals button' to simply resolve our equation and close the ends, we might literally be faced with death and we can't change things the ways that we want to change them, or the way we think things need to change to change the calculation to our favor, and don't forget the time constraints, we can't change things when we think things need to change, we can't control what we can't control with the time frame that we limit ourselves to, and the only logical factors/assets/resources/methodology that we consider in pushing back against such resistance and obstacles, in some respects we could say that the christian considers trials to be difficult times that everyone must face at some moments and seasons in our life, we can't avoid them, maybe we need a miracle to change the outcome of an unfavorable event, sometimes trials feel like a giant boot-kick to the groin, sometimes we find peace to where we just go with the flow, where we have embraced reality and certain situations as painful and unavoidable and then perspectives sometimes change too, sometimes a change in perspective is a result of a self-correcting personal evolution... sometimes a change of perspective requires another christian principle, one of humility, a component to humility requires people to assume that there is some actual intelligent and superior god, with making that assumption, or consideration, then we are our own god that lies to ourselves to say that we are never wrong, and don't require self-control/adjusting/correction/growing/maturing and evolving and expanding our understanding for a more complete and fulfilling life, i don't know much about physics and vocabulary, but i think it goes something like this, in order for 'human expansion' to occur there is friction and resistance which must be met, without resistance we can't expand, we stay neutral, and contract and waste, we must face resistance in order to expand, otherwise this scrawny little skinny kid would have shriveled-up and died long ago, but i exercised my frail weakly skinny body with resistance and exercise and purposeful nutrition, and am much more healthy then when i was wee-one, so it seems... without trials and hope and humility there is little room for self-correction, little reason to consider self-correction, and certainly no reason to want to face resistance... with free-will comes great responsibility, if we can't self-correct and adjust then we end up in jail or worse because we didn't utilize our free-will wisely and responsibly, we loose certain freedoms and benefits and even life itself sometimes when we misuse free-will and get ahead of ourselves in wanting to control our own destiny, maybe we can control our own destiny, but we simply can't do that if we aren't evolving and self-correcting and adjusting as if we were our own perfect little gods, maybe we are made in god's likeness, but we can't compare our intelligence to that of god's, we are inferior with more confines than god, so we must factor in humility when we approach trials and obstacles and hurdles and life get's a running start to thrust the boot into our sexual organ area, we may not only just need a miracle, the miracle might start when considering if we are missing something in front of our nose, the thing in the mirror, sometimes trials begin externally but grow internally, sometimes problems are internal but spill over to the external, sometimes life is easier and more enjoyable than other times, sometimes it get's harder as we grow and mature, sometimes we expand and sometimes we contract, sometimes we are simply stuck in neutral and don't seem to consider that some of our perspectives and words and thoughts and behaviors and routines need to change, sometimes we realize we need glasses and we get some, sometimes we realize that some glands don't work correctly, and we need a bit of lithium for endocrinology-sake, or regulate sugar to some degree, sometimes we need to get better sleep, or more hydration, or better food to survive and regulate and live more meaningful and purposeful lives, some trials we may never comprehend the depth and the variables that are connected and involved to a world full of free-willed humans and animals whirling around us... look, i'm not a professional anything, so don't take my words for it, but if anything above sounds interesting then i invite the reader to research some of these thoughts on your own... do your own research and prayer and see if god speaks to you somehow or another, it's my understanding that sometimes understanding something more fully and clearly can be god's way of speaking to you, but don't take my word for it, i'm a simple man. -- ct

02-20-22: the chess-match/strategy that's going on in the russia-area of the world is fascinating to observe as a bystander, nothing that's going on over there is as simple as you or anyone else might like to think/consider, and it's not nearly as complex as others might speculate based on the completeness of factual and relevant intel, but world affairs seems to include international networks that most folks won't care to consider, nor would we consider the strength and depth of such networked organizations and world leaders and relevant influencers... to some degree you could say that large/vast networks exhibited common narratives/words and actions/behaviors, and displayed coordination in different parts of the world, and exploited situations and events to enact many similar policies and reactions to things like wide-spread germs and colds and viruses and the like, and dividing this particularly multi-racial and diverse ethnic young nation called the USA, don't think for a minute that race-baiting and reactions to police handlings/mishandlings aren't being exploited to further influence policy and 'race separating', i'll expand more on that in another post maybe, as i try to develop my own perspective based on information that i've been consuming, i've read plenty of other people's opinions and perspectives, but that's only based on what information they consume and how they might be influenced and persuaded to form bias, unless there really is such a thing as an unbiased person that doesn't have different yet complex creative-intelligence and DNA and interpretations of the beauty of nature and what environments we grow and develop in, so the information that we consume and the various size environments that we consider, and the organizations that display similar methods/methodology exhibited by famous old-timer world leaders such as lennin, stalin, marx, putin, hitler, castro, kim, xi, trudeau and others alike ... you know, some of those folks... anyhow, more on that later, but much of that is actually a part of reality that is being carried-out and widely accepted as public and societal normalcy, i try to eliminate ignorance when considering that there are some straight-up nasty deviant cops, and many of them might be racists too, because some bad apples exist in every profession and industries and networks and demographics and environments for millennium... it's just how it goes with humans... but with that said, if you consider some of the topics just mentioned, then maybe you start to see a bit of the 'story of our time'... there aren't a bunch of regular readers on this lousy website blog-thing, but for those that are, i'm going to just start calling a new project SOOT, or soot, because it relates to a broad look at the story of our time... there are many periods of history that offer historical hindsight from which we grow as a civilization, and some times have interesting stories to tell, and i think that the story of the covid-era is an interesting story to tell, and that's a bit of what i want to focus some attention towards... i'm not sure how far back and how wide i want to, or are capable of, trying to consider and include, but there are many stories going on that make-up recent history and the stories of the last recent years, i'm also fifty-two, so you get it based on the types of experiences that an american born and rasied guy of my age might consider... the power and beauty of using racial separation to influence policy and intimidate is that the manipulative word associations used by those who practice such racial distinctions is to now label some who might point-out some obvious facts and happens to be of european ancestry and are genetically formed to be quite white, although Crayola Crayons Colors of the World Collections calibrates me to a color called 'very light rose' i think it was called, i'll have to find the box around the house and hold them up to my skin again to verify, but the color description they used was emasculating enough that i just thought to myself that i'd just assume rather be called white, because that's what i was called/labeled when i was growing up, certain people keep track of us all for some reasons or another, and track us by contrasting skin pigmentation as well as other things too... i don't mind saying that i'm an almost bright-white american born citizen with an italian-irish--hence european--ancestry, so 'by default' i'm about as white as they make 'em, i look toward the sun more than a minute or two and i fvcking burn man, but ask any normal person of any other skin-tone that has worked along-side and collaborated with me for any length of time if my perspectives, words, and actions would suggest that by default i am some how a racist and support racist policies and segregation-- from my perspective normal people just don't really think like that, they might be influenced and conditioned that way over time by environment and experiences, maybe from some ignorant folks, or folks that had negative experiences with contrasting skin-tinted individuals or groups of similar tinted individuals, but the narrative that by default a white tinted person born in america is a racist and supports racist policy based on genetics and geography is just manipulative nonsense, and so when i point out exploits of racial activists i will by default be labeled a white nationalist racist, that's sort of the default method that social and racial activists typically exhibit, i'm referring to folks that are trying to effect policy and funding, and like to use to the manipulation method that's become commonly referred to as 'cancel culture', there is no such 'culture' of canceling, it's that more people have access to the internet to voice themselves, and many of those folks use similar manipulation methods to try to belittle/dehumanize/de-legitimize targets that they, or their network, doesn't like or agree with, i'm sure some smart folks have already written much more about the persuasive and manipulative tactics implored through cancel-culture, maybe even considering common human motivators, and proposed or effected policy too, i'm sure there's a good book or two on that sort of stuff... but some deviant-haters that are skin-toned focused exhibit extra disdain for anyone that is genetically and differently tinted... with that said there are folks that have an 'extra disdain' for folks that look different, i grew-up in a few towns and cities that were in middle-sex country MA, but most of my schooling was in a predominantly european-colored population, you know, bright-white... so some assholes have a disdain in their heart for people who are look a bit different in any way will simply call-out facial features that are prominent or small, or hair-color or style, or if your shy or tall or short or heavy, or if you have braces or glasses, or how you are clothed, or if you were in certain tax-brackets, or if your european ancestors or any other ancestries were from this fvcking country, or that fvcking country, and if you were from this part of town then you were this sort of piss-on, or ignorant, tribal-centric division even though most of us were pretty damn 'white', there was a large population of roman catholic as well as eastern orthodox churches in that town, and tribal-categorization would happen with folks from one similar church on this part of town towards folks that go to an almost copy-cat version of it at another end of town...haters found ways to categorize and hate regardless if there was a large population of darker skin kids and families or not, we didn't separate or minimize/legitimize folks based on african or indian or other darker skin-toned nations, nope, we just found other distinctions to try to minimize/cancel to exert some leverage or control in certain folks... that's my perspective coming from a guy that that was raised by a broke single mom who had to rely on public assistance most of my life, and associated and identified quite well with other broke families that lived in similar housing and conditions and had all different skin-tones than mine... it seems like folks that show/exhibit the golden-rule seem to get along without racial prejudice, but there are some deviants that use skin-tone as a litmus test for acceptance and i'm not good with that at all... i don't doubt that there are such racist/separatists still congregated in certain parts of the country, and i appreciate when they are challenged, there are still folks that think that african slaves should never have been freed, and it's a sad truth that lives-on today... so when you look at what groups like BLM actually did with their time/energy/resources and ensuing wealth then you start looking at the motives of the leaders of such movements and revolutions, who they are sponsored by and networked with and who and what they also influence... of course normal people think that every life is important and matters, i know that anti-abortionists certainly think so, i know most legitimate christians do too, so BLM was the most clever slogan devised in modern history in both bringing police brutality to light, as well as separating people based on contrast of skin tone and heritage... i have a late cousin that i admire in many respects... he's as white as we get, too... he worked in urban environments for many years and appreciated folks of all different skin-tints, and one of the last memorable quotes that he said to me was 'some of the worse shit done to me was by other irish people, not other races... there was wisdom in his words, unloving and impulsive people exist in all shapes, sizes, and colors, and come from lot's of different places and from lot's of different circumstances, but the rise of race-baiting tactics and manipulation and more skin-colored centric policy should be considered when we think of the summer of the rise of BLM and antifa in the streets of america, marxist revolutionary tactics are being utilized by more 'activist groups' and when predominantly white tuckers in canada push-back on authoritarian executives and government policies and power grabs, that's when they get called all sorts of strange yet reveling projections from networked government administrations and executives and narrative strategists and mouth-pieces with a platform... some of my favorite people in the world have very dark skin and speak quite differently than me, and none of them seemed to fall for the race-bait politics, unfortunately some aRe of the philosophy that you got to get every nickle and dime, get the most out of government that you can, that's a whole perspective that needs a separate essay, but some folks do need help from time to time, and sometimes more than others... and some of my friends even protested a bit that summer, more for the street-party atmosphere i think, but none seemed to get caught up in activism narrative, much of unrest used social-unrest and activism that triggered a bunch of folks who were told they couldn't work and had to stay home for long periods of time... the social unrest used the momentum/energy of covid reactions and restrictions and triggered a bunch of folks that had their lives pulled-out from under our feet... many racial/social activists assume that everyone behaves like tribal warriors against anyone of contrasting skin-tones and that's simply just not the case, but social and race activists are claiming as much, so BLM was a brilliant source of energy for a new wave of activists and anti-americans that bought the theory that america and americans are racist by default... it doesn't take very long to research a bit about blm influencers... from a pretty humble white guy that claims zero supremacy in anything i can tell you that racial activism certainly feels like a decisive dividing wedge that i don't particularly appreciate, but you can call me, or label me anything that you must, but BLM became a tool for certain networks and leaders and influencers, don't be a fool and tell me it wasn't... now go look and see what they actually did with the funds that they raised... don't feel bad of you were fooled, it happens all of the time considering the size of some networks and how much and what types of information and media we consume... anyways... there is much to cover in the SOOT, and much has already been covered on this website over the past year or so... peace. -- ct

02-20-22 later:  i put a link to a new outline/project on this website, if your curious and want to find it and want to respond with some input of your own, well please feel free to do so... there are lot's of big stories to tell, and the story of our time is a story to consider, and to show/tell to future generations, future generations deserve to know the truth, so don't be myopic in focus, marxists certainly aren't, they have been raising new generations of activists, leaders, and policy-makers... the soot should be informative and worthy of writing.  --  ct

02-20-22 more later:  dang-it, i got reminded of an old post that i had read, and commented-on from C. Langan on social media platform 'gab'... and now that i see that much of what i want to put into a wrapper/story format he has sort of been writing, to different degrees and with different language, but we must be consuming much of the same news sources, but i guess that's what happens when you 'follow' someone on media platforms, they influence and encourage readers to research similar news sources... but now i have to go back and read a bunch of his posts again, and from further back than i had read before, because he might have already told the whole story but in different pieces and different ways... so i guess most of my effort might be putting a creative wrapper around other people's insight, i don't always feel good about doing so, but i guess as long as credit is given and appreciation demonstrated then it's good?  i dunno, but i've started focusing on the story-line a bit and it's fun.  --  ct

02-20-22 a bit more later: look, some of the things that i write about are all things that people already know and consider, but hope/trust that tomorrow’s events will be solved by nice people in leadership positions today, many folks are too busy and distracted with living life to stop and put words to things that we sort of know already, but never tried to give too much thought or consideration into... but folks don’t think enough about foreign interference in our everyday lives, but to a big extent foreign interference is a big part of they way some people in america live their lives, the same with other places around the world too, it's just the way it goes really... networks of opportunistic and compromised and motivated influencers, who themselves are influenced by foreign propaganda/interference are literally influencing millions of zombies and sheep and american policy, whether we stop to consider that or not is entirely up to the end-user, but don’t be naive in thinking that just because you would never do something like that or aren't capable of even doing something like that yourself that others aren’t actually taking part of that everyday of our lives, if you spend much time in certain areas of the country to have probably interacted with a foreign asset or two, or more depending on your zip-code and profession or areas of study, you can count on that... why would i make such a statement like that, well because it's true, folks will try to use information and potential assets to gain more useful information and influence a desired goal/outcome, it's just the way it is... i've never been involved in that sort of profession, but it only took a fifteen minute meeting with someone to come to a certain reality about the world of intelligence, i never looked into it, and it ended-up that the line of work that i was going to require special privileges never panned-out, so it was all for much about nothing, thousands of dollars of money tossed away to make sure i wasn't a bad-guy, all for a little bit of an educational experience for me, so i don't really know much about how certain people do their jobs in intel and influence, but they sort of showed be during a vetting test, and that was pretty eyeopening itself, beware of the beautiful woman that show's exceptional interest... how's this for an eye-opening experience for you, i don't know what the professionals call it, i just call it a big thank-you for the heads-up... i'm a young man that's had a few drinks and just trying to have a good night out with some bros, we go visit a few bars and places to eat, we are in this one bar and i go in the men's room and make proper use of the urinal and a pretty large/tall local domes in and uses the other urinal beside me and starts asking questions about where i'm from and what do i do and who am i there with, and i probably shared just enough that he targeted me, they guy says something like 'oh, you can see the guys doing their night-jumps and landings near my place, you and your buddies should come join me', and i'm like 'i don't know what to think of this guy, but i like drinking a few beers outside around a fire and watching the night-sky'... well, actually i don't remember exactly what i was thinking, it was a long time ago... but i exit the men's room, and i go to the bar, and a guy sitting there casually asks me about what the guy in the men's room had asked me, i tell him that, and that alone... and the guy says, well if i were you i might want to just leave the bar with your buddies, and if that guy approaches you guys at all say that you aren't interested and need to get back on base soon, because he is going to invite you and your buddy's back to his place, and he's going to pull-out one of the biggest knives that you have ever seen when he has the opportunity to isolate you at his place, and you will be victimized in one capacity or another... i looked him in his eyes, after a satisfying few seconds i thanked him for the heads-up and proceeded to collect my buddies and we left the bar and onto a different venue... i had that experience a couple of weeks into jump-school, and prior to my process to receive special privileges at another part of america, colorado was beautiful except when it was cold, and i met some of my favorite people while i hung out there for a bit... but my point is that knowing that just because your name is on some list which states that you have special privileges, but the mere fact that you are on this list that other foreign nations will know your name and who you are... how fvcking nuts is that to consider, it was pretty strange and insightful to a battlefield construction grunt that wanted to change jobs after a couple years of repetitive and boring training, so i'm not one of those special people that new about special privileged things, i just simply went through the vetting process, which was pretty eye-opening, i mean, who ever thought about that sort of stuff anyways... it just helped me to understand that there might always be something more than meets the eye when you consider that intelligence and persuasion are professions that professional smart people and subordinates do everyday for a living, but who ever knew that, certainly not a naive city-boy, but the whole vetting process was incredibly useful for a greater understanding of reality... anyways, glad to set the record straight, again, i'm not an important person, i'm not a professional anything, and i've never had to really work in a job where you had to have special privileges for very long, it was so silly and a waste of time and energy and focus, really, my resume is boring but a but eclectic, nothing really special about any of my experiences... glad to set the record straight... but i really don't like the thought of being surveilled or vetted, they are both nauseating but necessary i suppose. -- ct

02-19-22: so i think i'll take a crack at a 'stranger than life' sort of novel, maybe some action and suspense... i dunno... i'm still bouncing some ideas around, and organizing themes and variables and establishing some other facets... it seems like the more you know your target audience the better you can adjust the scope/depth of the story, you can adjust your various stories within the story for audience, you can structure each layer-depth and characters for various demographics and potential audiences... i haven't studied any of the professions within the media and communications and entertainment industries, but i've been trying to learn from movies over the past few years, and movies that my kids watch and like, and reading from professional communicators, and learning from the execution of their crafts... so i don't have a formula really, yet, for what elements and how to narrow or enlarge reader/viewership, but i've been learning some... i tend to write more literal than artistic/creatively, mostly due to communicating as efficiently as possible in office settings through email, i forget what term they coined for it, 'business cut to the chase', or something like that, and then i got a bit back more to platform function and customer customization and direct customer support, it was for a new and semi-complex sector GIS is what they called it... and then after that i had to communicate to, and train couriers/delivery-drivers, and most of them were english second language, so the communication and instructions for them had to be broken-down to mostly fourth-grade english, and then i did some MSM support and installations in between those jobs, and then i did some odd jobs as self-employed as well as working in some shooting-sports tools and accessories, and then for the small electrical contractor for a couple of years... so i don't really have a specialized target audience to figure out how to communicate to, which is partly why i write as simply as i do on this blog, many people hate it's simplicity and in-adherence to structured writing, i think that's hilarious, if you can't even tolerate it then fair-enough, but if you can't appreciate simple then there is nothing to appreciate here on my crummy website... so i try to write in a semi-creative style in a crude and simple and direct execution... so i mention all of that to say that taking a crack at a larger project and hoping for the opportunity to maybe profit a bit more from writing should be pretty cool... i think it would be more docu-drama, a story of our times based on recent history, i think that's what it is... now i might have to read a couple of decent novels to see how the pros did it, i mostly consumed movie entertainment and news and some other interests over the years,... anyhow, i'm looking forward to organizing certain aspects of the story over the next few days, the characters have already offered themselves/profiles for the world to see, so that part is pretty easy... i might try to take an online course real quick if i can find one we can afford, it might help the process a bit, wish me luck and pray for me, however you offer your well-wishes it's appreciated. -- ct

02-19-22 later:  sometimes you'd like to be a fly on the wall with complete and factual and full intelligence... hind-sight helps connect the dots, but the quality of relevant information is always subject... we use our own 'intel' everyday to make smart decisions, sometimes we utilize information well, and sometimes we opt for the triple-pounder bacon cheeseburger with the small diet coke option, and then other times we add a half-sheet cake and a bucket-o-fries to the meal and wash it all down with a quart of spirits and soda... sometimes we use information well, and sometimes we don't, sometimes we execute decent plans and other times we don't, but quantity and quality of information helps or prevents folks from making smart decisions, which is why i hate censorship and controlled data and intel and counter-intelligence measures... i really don't care for various levels of herd-control through bogus intel and data and information.  --  ct

02-19-22 more later: the computer is behaving once again... so i just watched a couple of 'avengers' episodes from a series called 'what if', we just watched two of them, and the second one made me stop and devote some time process a bit more of what some of the story 'told us', Dr Strange gets into some mystic arts and so you get some philosophy/ethics regarding what you would do with other power that you couldn't do within our physical self and natural powers... and then some of what fascinates me most is about time, and the ability to influence time and events, you get some theory and philosophy about god, time, absolutes, variables that can be manipulated... much of that is fascinating to me... C. Langan touches on much of the subject of time and free-will in his three-paper collection released in a book titled 'the art of knowing', but if i try to understand a tiny sliver of manipulating time i would say that it's entirely possible, because every action that we take and decisions that we make can be completely compulsive with very little consequential thought given, or can trigger a brilliant course of events by slowing time down in our minds and making sound conscious decisions and actions, i would try my best to understand some of the things that i've watched and listened to and both, and what i've read, and i would suggest that the very gift of the degree of free will that we are blessed with, and the decisions and actions that we exercise with free-will is the ability to influence both time and events, to what degree we have the ability to do so is something that i don't care to speculate on, however, there is this philosophy and theory in this thing called 'prayer', where simply asking the giver of life for assistance in a matter/matters seems to yield positive outcome, the positive outcomes don't always come as quick and painless as we might like, but prayer seems to be a request for cause and effect for the ability to change to potential outcome for a situation of various complexities... i don't know much about time, and what people do with it, but it seems like time is every bit a resource as the air that we breathe and the food we eat and the fluids that we consume, it seems that the gifts of time and free-will and connected to some degree, and they are both gifts/resources, it seems like much of intelligence is knowing how to use both in concert while considering the two most important 'commandments'... but don't take my word for it, research those thoughts on your own if they sound interesting enough... anyways, i watched a couple of those marvel shows with some family members, and i wonder if the writers are networked with some 'theorists'. -- ct

02-18-22 laterer:  here are a couple of decent articles to consider, the first is written by a professional smart person, it's about some common/typical behavioral/instinctual human 'motivators', sometimes simple things like typical motivators tell us 'why we do what we do'... give it a quick read, it's not very heady and it gets to the nitty-gritty pretty quickly...

... and then read the this quick fox news post regarding some of Peter Shweizer's latest book

02-18-22 more later:  OK, so now i have another idea for a novel, but i don't want to start it until i finish the other project that i want to finish first, and i'm totally re-working that one and haven't been very motivated to address it lately... maybe i just knock-out the novel and then go back to the allegory afterwards, maybe the covid-era thing is something to jump-on as it formulates, i think i just wrote the outline above, in some respects... anyways, i'll have to sleep on it and maybe have more insight soon enough, but it could easily be a decent movie, there are enough networked variables and stories within stories that make-up the story, it has enough layers to be interesting, but how much time do i devote to that, time will tell... good night.  --  ct

02-17-22: as i've been learning to write/communicate/express my observations/perceptions, or you might say that as i've been 'honing my craft', i think that learning a bit more about the way that 'i'm wired', so to speak, has been necessary and helpful... and so reading a bit more on human sciences like physiology, psychology, epidemiology is helpful, but most interesting to me has been endocrine related, and how endocrine is completely reactive/related to the other sciences and body and mind regulation... and then i was even looking into tests that measure things such as personality styles/traits, and iq measuring tests, and then/also what smart people think of such tests and those things that they measure... as far as taking IQ tests are concerned, my advice to the reader, the first time you take one, you might skip over the whole test until you get to the part where you can add your comments, and in the comment section simply write the following: 'it's not what you got that counts, but how you use it'... you could follow-up with something like 'i'm probably an average-processing/abled person, sometimes slower than average interpretation/processing/response time than smarter folks, but a bit more perceptive and quick about some others things, though'... , and then the second time you approach such tests you might want to make sure you had a good night's sleep, are well hydrated, have decent nutritional intake, and give the test your full attention and concentration, and then tell yourself that whatever the results/score reveal you must know that your knowledge of those results is just an interesting thing to consider in life, more than likely the better choices you make in life the better you will eventually score on some of those types of tests, some of us learn faster or slower than others and everyone is unique and gifted or impaired to some extent, and then the understanding of your scores on some tests might be especially good to consider when making big-boy/girl decisions that might be a bit more involved than what you've been exposed-to/environment/experience/education/calculations and the like... it seems that some extra smart folks will tell you that genetic factors have much to do with speed, storage, processing capabilities as much as information input, sometimes it skips a generation or two, and sometimes it don't, but how you grow/mature/evolve as you learn and observe life, well, i already said, what gifts and impairments you have is interesting to know, but how you use what you've got might be even more important than what you've got itself... if i were be a bit introspective and analyze myself a bit i would say that i probably have a pretty good ability to recognize and 'see' some spatial and mechanical things pretty well, words are more important to me than math, i'm only a math-guy when i need to learn something mathy, and then pattern-recognition and understanding how certain things connect as well as seeing which things don't belong, or, don't match, sometimes i'm pretty good at 'finding waldo', since i'm not formally trained to do very many things my creativity is typically realized in the way that i solve everyday problems as i try to evolve with life, and my creativity is also realized in word utilization and formation, and really, well, really, i'm pretty good at 'story-telling', story telling is just how i explain certain things, it's a bit passive and less direct then when i migh have had to write instructions/steps... anyways, there you go, there's my 'test'... i'm in my fifties now, and still trying to learn utility, there are some things that i have professional experience with that i could probably still do quite well, but i need challenges that can occupy my curiosity and interest at the same time, i don't do well with boring repetitive things that seem irrelevant... that's some of my dilemma... anyways, changing course a bit here... i'm not going into the personality/trait calculations/tests that consider those sorts of things regarding me, that's for the reader to consider/discern, but this crummy/crappy/simple blog ought to be insightful to the psychologist, i think i'm an open book. -- ct

02-17-22 later:  so this crappy service that i'm renting/utilizing has a bunch of 'robot test/verification' tests hitting recently, is that the service provider doing their random due-diligence, or is that triggered by specific hacking attacks... i suppose i don't really know, but i'm just going to keep doing my thing and plugging right along.  --  ct

02-16-22: i've been writing more on the political section of this simple blog mostly/lately... i have some more to write about the subjects that i've expanded upon recently, i feel a bit more challenged to include more detail in my criticisms of the brandon administration and policy and resulting destabilizing and devaluating our currency, and other outright economic irresponsibly, in fact it's so irresponsible that it's implications/effects have surged inflation and about doubled the price of fossil-fuel in one short year... they can try to blame their disastrous policies and theories and philosophies on covid and trump all they want, but they have implemented an assault on fossil-fuel and the machines which are fueled by coal and gas, like things that can charge electric batteries, but they know that, as a nation we had a nasty economic period of time where covid was released and spread, and world leaders reacted and acted in ways which became obstacles to business-as-normal, and they enacted policies which were guaranteed to hurt the economy even worse in regards to mandates and regulations and policies and fossil-fuel... they just can't be that stupid, and so that's my point for constantly mentioning 'networked associates', and globalist networks and agendas, those folks can influence policy when they feel the need to do so... the problem is nobody made globalists the right folks to make 'universal' decisions and manipulate resources and distribution and consumption... call me a nationalist if that's your preferred spin on someone that doesn't appreciate becoming a subject of experiments and market and resource fluctuations coordinated by globalist networks and smart-asses that think they have all the right answers... i'm just one of the normal folks that just want's to continue living in a an environment where the declaration of independence, the constitution, and the bill of rights all coincide where normal folks who understand the importance of simple things like the ten commandments, the golden rule, and the fruits of the spirit can appreciate the constitutional republic that i grew-up in, where personal freedom is assumed to all but the few who turn free-will into deviant actions or bad mistakes... i'm just one of the normal americans that doesn't appreciate foreign interference in regards to resource and social and economic manipulation, and a bunch of jack-ass policy-maker puppets that do what the big-boys/girls tell them what to do no matter what the cost is to their citizens/constituency, don't be a fool and ignore the socialist/communist/globalists that are implementing all sorts of policies world-wide on the piggy-back of a natural disaster such as pandemic and biological warfare... the europeans are waking-up to it, the canadians are waking-up to it, many americans are waking-up to it, australia and new zealand are waking-up to it... the reader shouldn't be totally distracted by local, and state, and federal manipulation and instability, you must connect some dots and consider global networks and leaders... anyways, just some food for thought. -- ct

02-16-22 later: it seems like Langan's terminology as 'conspansive manifold', it applies other laws/theories meaning there are plenty of other relevant applications, i would consider application to 'spiritual growth', and 'physiological changes', and becoming a useful member to society and others that are closer in relationship, while also becoming as self-sufficient/self-sustaining lifestyle... most folks understand basic physiological requirements to sustain a healthy and elongated life... i appreciate some primitive survival sorts of things, so when i say 'basic physiological needs' i mean basic long-term survival priorities, we need water, sleep, food, shelter, air, temperature/climate regulation from things like clothing and fire, and there plenty of other important things to consider for long-term well-functioning survival as well, movement/exercise, endocrine-regulation if we start 'breaking' in some way, there are nutritional do's and nutritional dont's depending on the delicate ecosystem of the individual-condition. -- ct

02-14-02 later:  we have reliable water-flow again, but the filter-less system is yielding a colorful tint and a high ppm that i'm not crazy about showering in yet, or subjecting the hot-water tank to... but we've got water again.  --  ct 

02-13-22:  yesterday reached a high of sixty degrees fahrenheit in the town of my residency... the snow that's currently falling suggests that it's no longer so... i suppose i'll check the forecast now, because i did NOT see this coming... i don't appreciate snow right now, in my noggin snow equates to labor in a cold wet environment, but for the sake of emotional distress i'll roll with the snow-flow and mention it's beauty, it's pretty... enough on the beauty... i like the sound dampening effect of it as well, outside is more quiet than usual, so it's got that going for it... i also like watching children that really enjoy it playing outside, and don't forget other mammals, watching a dog prance around and play in it brings a smile and a chuckle too... anyhow, i chipped away the ice that coated my neighbor's drive for about three hours yesterday in the productive sixty degrees and though that spring is about here, i was a bit disappointed to wake up and see snow falling... at least it looks pretty.  --  ct

02-12-22:  the last few days have been a bit strange, typical routine is out the window, not much time to gather thoughts and research interests, and write about such things, but ideas in yesterday's post (below) should start to get broken-up/categorized and expanded upon in the days to come, maybe even today if time permits... yesterday's time spent with some old friends was appreciated, walking through willowdale was enjoyable, as was conversation, and dinner alike... the local IPA and the fresh fish-n-chips didn't disappoint, what a treat... i'm thinking a bit more about some of the networked like-minded authoritarian leaders in the USA and Canada and Europe and many other nations as well, networked globalists seem to share similar strategies/narratives and vision, and it's a bit concerning, the Brandon-in-Chief that occupies the nursing home at 1600 Penn Ave has counseled the castro-offspring in ottawa to get tougher on the freedom convey participants and vehicles, will the dictator to the north start droning the semis like a turkey-shoot next, time will tell... dictators really don't like when the herds recognize, organize, and push back on ponzi-scheme policies which expand their network's wealth and control, they really don't care for their subservants organizing, however, they do appreciate folks in their network organizing and protesting, those folks are even allowed to destroy property and commit violence... do the communists in office really think that they are still fooling people, and can keep getting away with it, it seems so, some of the liberal-left are smelling the coffee and changing policy, but some are delusional and are trying to maintain momentum and control, some seem hell-bent on triggering civil war through divisive language/narratives and demonizing opposition, they are playground bullies that are enabled to exert predatorial instincts and maintain herd-control, and it's quite shameful behavior... anyways, i'm thinking about lot's of things, and hope to have some time to organize and articulate some of those in the near future.  --  ct

02-12-22 later:  i took the post above, and put it out to a couple of social network platforms, i turned off commenting because i don't care for some of the short and terse comments offered by some networked folks... a relative with solid perception wrote another post to respond with their insight, the following is her post and my response... i appreciated her post because it motivated me to expand on my original post, it may not matter much to the reader, but i got it off my chest and onto ones and zeros, so the therapeutic effect is realized and appreciated... anyhow, here goes:

" Well I just wanna say that I like reading your posts because they offer a fresh perspective. Right now I have no perspective. I’ve been a nurse 48 1/2 years, over 30 with the same company even though they’ve been bought and sold, and as of the 28th of this month I can work an 11 hour shift but on March 1 I will be terminated because I refuse to get a booster. When has the authoritarian dictatorship ever been as controversial as the thought of what can be injected into your body. I work as a hospice nurse for children at home and I’ve never had anyone be able to cover for me because there’s so few nurses so now my patient will be abandoned the job I have loved for so many years is over because I can’t work as a nurse anywhere cause I won’t get a third job looks like my doctorate in infectious and communicable diseases doesn’t mean anything so hi ho hi ho it’s off to working at Goodwill where everyone is friendly and 'everybody knows your name' "

well stated Doreen... the optimist in me wants to point out that there are sound medical professionals, scientists, and analysts that are looking at raw data/evidence--not just controlled data to support narratives and mistakes made by other professional smart people--and are finally breaking through with certain policy-makers to modify over-reactive 'emergency executive power/authority' which were granted to executives to enact/dictate policies which other networked executives have agreed would be best for their constituency, one variable to the problem of executive authority is that many politicians are both puppets and performance actors and actresses... they are given a script which some of us call a 'narrative' which speaks to being mere puppets and not free-thinkers, and then they just have to play their role to the best of their abilities which supports the acting classes that some seem to have paid attention to... as time passes and we are offered the gift of hindsight and evidence for future consideration and self-correction, i think more folks will understand the sorts of opportunistic and deviant words and actions exhibited by many smart people that should have been more concerned with facts rather than network controlled-language/narrative... hind-sight should also avail the ponzi-scheme aspect of natural disaster and germ exploitation, when history shows us which companies and individuals that profited from the nasty germ, which controlled data and narrative was used by them, and their actions/behaviors and policies they embraced, then we will see things such as 'why they did what they did--motivation', and 'who else did what they did--other profiteers'... when you consider the effects and stress of over-reactive policy, the devastating affects to many people's livelihoods, and the removal/forfeiture of individual freedom that american citizens are endowed by our creator, we will begin to understand the devastation caused by reactions and over-reactions by folks that were in on the greatest ponzi-scheme of our lifetime... but in order to consider the magnitude of the crovid-opportunity then you must consider how large/vast some networks are, by the very name/label 'globalists' are a part of a much larger network than most of us 'regular people' envision... when you consider globalist organizations, the members of those organizations, and the expressed goals of such networks, well that's when i begin to narrow much of my disgust to authoritative executives that strip-away individual freedoms, because many of them belong to the same clubs/networks/organizations that belong to the philosophy that people are too stupid to know what's good for them, so herd-control with manipulative/controlled language and narratives is just a simple necessity, it's why they do what they do, lack of transparency is just out-right lying, when you consider the reasoning/motivation of liars, and the magnitude of many networks, well, a simple man/me can get a bit disappointed by the words and actions of professional smart people... understanding instinctual human behaviors, personality traits/types, and things that motivate folks should all be considered when reading everything that i just wrote... call me a jerk, call me simple, call me misinformed, call me what you want, but time/hindsight will give better insight/detail then my simple opinions/observations/perspectives... i'm not a professional anything, so don't take my words for it, time will tell the rest of the story... Doreen and I will evolve/adapt/transition to possibly new sources of income as professional pseudo-smart people continue to milk the exploitation of disasters for all it's worth... pray for us, we require some of that as we grow and evolve... peace.  --  ct

02-11-22: at least i had some sleep through the night/morning, it wasn't much, but i don't have much physical labor forecast/expected today, so i ought to be able to function with adequate capacity today, at least thats my theory, time will tell... i've only written one sentence (or resemblance of) and spell-check has already accomplished much, so if that's any indicator for the rest of the day, well maybe my theory is already busted-open... anyways, i have much to write, and many thoughts and information to organize, contemplate, and regurgitate, but my level of consciousness seems to be quite impaired at the moment, but here are some keywords to consider when i am capable of better function, and i have enough time to devote without being rushed: genetic pre-dispositions, stressors, recovery time, transition/evolution, adjusting to stressors and changes which are thrust upon us, adam schiff and sociopathy and ability to channel some nasty telors, globalist sociopathy and manipulative exploitation to set their own rules and govern various herds to maintain power, smart folks that use genetic gifts/talents to fvck with others... consider the village idiot with the mind of a child that follows the template of Jesus and considers words like: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, self-control in conjunction with loving God with all your heart, as well as loving others to the extent that they love themselves... and consider the village elders/wise-man who exercises their insight/wisdom/knowledge to prove to themselves how smart they are by controlling and manipulating the rest of the village to labor, think of pyramid schemes, think of embezzlers, think of folks that use their gifts to exercise/satisfy their impulses and desires... consider law-makers and policy makers and influencers that exploit humanity and twist facts and distort reality as they expand their individual wealth and networks... these are a few thoughts bouncing around the noggin... beware of the globalist, sometimes they are too smart for their own good and for good natured folks which the sociopath considers inferior and must be controlled/aligned/exploited... beware of the socialist agenda, herd control might be wise to some extent in overpopulated and over-consuming geographies, but what's good for the urbanites are not wise for the ruralists... one size does not fit all... anyways, those are just a few thoughts running around the melon today... today is going to be a loooong day, a bit more sleep may have lead to efficiency in articulating some thoughts which i'm contemplating... i think a power nap is in my future... perhaps the reader can pray for me, or wish me luck, or something, i probably require a bit of your help... anyhow, enjoy your day, and consider our creator, the golden rule, and the fruits of the spirit as we welcome-in the weekend. -- ct

02-10-22: i think i'm beginning to narrow/understand/articulate some of reasoning behind most of my harsh posts, and the bulk of my 'political' posts. i think seeing and contemplating the old quote 'it's easier to fool someone than to convince them they were fooled'... it got me thinking about more about some aspects of why i do what i do... so one of those tests that they used to give kids in high school, waaay back when, the thing said that i should consider being a lawyer... i think psychology would have been a better discipline to pursue given much of my interests, some folks have a 'bull-shit meter' of sorts, and pick up on certain traits/personality types, predator and deviant-instincts that some folks exhibit, i haven't dug too much in true study into behavioral psych, but it's an interest, but i do have a decent bull-shit meter, and the BS-meter has gone off the charts going back the past few years based on the words and actions of influencers/elected officials/media... so basically i'm starting to focus more on behavioral pysch, i don't think i'd ever try to pursue it as a practice because sometimes i really fvcking hate predators that are too smart for their own good, meaning that they are using their genetic and environmental gifts and available resources to lie/cheat/steal and actually destroy folks who they minimize. i don't care for predators who do such things whether they are fully away of their actions and behaviors or not, depending on how calculating they are, and their motivations and goals, and the depth of negative or harmful impact which they cause or are willing to cause to achieve their desired results, well, i have little respect for folks that deceive and manipulate others, it show's that they don't have a decent grip on reality, there is a spectrum of trying to accomplish selfish desires versus accomplishing desires that consider other's folks needs/interests/goals ... maybe if some of today's influencer's were more transparent about their motivations and desired results/outcome, maybe if folks would be a bit more forthright and honest with the rest of humanity perhaps i'd be less motivated to write about their deviant and predatory words and actions/behaviors... sometimes i'm pretty naive/gullible as well, i like to assume that everyone has decent intent, and are honest and transparent to the depth that i typically exhibit, but that's just simply not the case, and depending on how small or how large your vision/geography/environment then the larger the impact on society, and the greater potential for beneficial or negative impact on humanity... i think i'm motivated to home my writing on manipulative deviant traits and personality types, and the sorts of tactics that they use to express their fucked-upedness understanding and distortions of reality... as i study i will try to teach the reader to recognize such deviant behaviors, because if the saying is true, and it's easier to fool someone than to convince them they were fooled, then i will continue to educate my kids, and anyone else that cares to read how to slow-down your thought-process enough to consider predatorial words and motivators and actions,,, i suppose that's what i've been doing all along, but now i can articulate my motivations a bit better than a year ago... if you haven't noticed, i've picked up/learned and used some of the harsh language utilized by such predators, it's not that hard to be a harsh asshole, that's what some folks with larger environments trigger the networked herd to do... some folks use their wisdom and understanding to project their own distortions of reality, and that bugs me a bit. -- ct

02-09-22:  so i have a new paper to write... not sure if i should release it as soon as it's done, or if i will coincide it with the next election... either way, i think it will be decent

02-09-22 later:  look, i know i can be a bit harsh when i notice scumbag scammers and predators... yesterday i replied to one of those sorts of people with the following:  no problem, but i just wanted to let you know that you are a predatorial bottom-dwelling waste-of-sperm/egg pudding-head that uses your intellect for nothing but shit-production, you could make an honest living doing something productive with your potential, but right now you seem to be using your god-given gifts for no good, consider repenting

... they decided to 'unfriend' me... and now the scammers and spoofers and skid-marks on society have lined-up to harass me... good grief... i liken it to when trump declared war on the washington 'swamp', and so the collective swamp teamed-up and retaliated with zeal... scum-bag predators.  --  ct

02-08-22:  had a crappy night's sleep, woke up with brain-fog, i ought to be manic by now with the coffee and sugar that i've consumed, and a couple of sudafed that i took once i realized that nasal congestion plus the barometric/environmental air-pressure combination was a large part of the brain-fog, it wasn't just sleep, it was over-stimulated mind trying to analyze an unexpected problem when i should have been getting ready for bed, taking too long to to fall asleep, then whatever it is that my brain ought to be doing when i'm fully asleep must have just not happened, or not happened deep enough, or didn't happen long enough, so a few hours into sleep and the alarm goes off, i wake up and it's still raining from yesterday, add in the nasal congestion and my physiological issues with ears and nasal passages, well then you feel like me at 5:am... i certainly didn't need all of the coffee, i probably could have gone without the sudafed and drank a bunch of water instead, but i just assumed that sleep was the entire problem, and the hot coffee was spot-on extra delicious... so even though i ought to manic right now based on this morning's input, i am not at all, pulse is good, and i'm about crazy tired... today isn't going to be very productive in some sense, because i'm going for the short nap now, and praying for insight to a few problems to get the nap started.  --  ct

02-08-22 later:  what a strange nap, i can't really recall 99.95 percent of my dreams, but during my quick nap of sorts i was in a semiconscious state where i sort of dreamed, but was pretty darn awake still, too.  i saw lot's of still images of faces, and face/busts of mostly very old famous people, it was almost like a laser/light-show projection in the foreground, and a different background which was mostly still... anyways, very strange nap/dream combination, i set the alarm for 25 min, and then snapped-out of the dream-state with a phone call and the alarm sounding off at the same time, very strange.  --  ct

02-08-22 later than the last post: so i've been in a seemingly 'dimmed' state of consciousness today, shortened and irregular sleep was much to blame, so to write that today has been out of sorts is an understatement, it was still as busy as most days, but i used free time differently, i didn't consume stimulating information very much (i hardly read anything), nor did i regurgitate previously consumed information (i barely wrote a word), instead, i mostly prioritized responsibilities which affected other folks, and then tried to ease/treat/medicate the impaired and dimmed cognition that i woke-up with... basically, the crappy feeling/state that i woke up with really set the stage for how the rest of the day progressed... as typical for most tuesdays, i spent about an hour speaking with a friend who is better equipped to teach me about more about me than the rest of my support system combined, meaning that he isn't emotionally attached or biased, and understands enough about psychology and 'religion' and helping folks re-calibrate from some rather nasty seasons, and has a genuine concern for other people's welfare, he lives his faith... what does all that mean, well, i considered the conversation a valuable part of the week... so today i had much more to contemplate than a typical week-day, and he contributed to the 'things to think about' mental list which is starting to pile-up a bit, any though/idea/theory that gets me to exercise the old noggin a bit is appreciated... so i don't know if the rest of the afternoon/evening will be productive or not, i have supper to put together (taco tuesday), and dishes that piled up awfully quick-like, and the water/well pump is misbehaving to the point where it must be dealt with, and then there is people, the family conversation and company is more important than the chores, so family supersedes the crappy responsible goals as far as i'm concerned... so the rest of the night has some goals, my physiological deficiencies may dictate the actuality of my goals, and then the family variable will trump everything else, as far as i know... anyways, today was a weird day from awakening, to some conversation, to my nap/dreams, and even up to now... and now i must face the responsibilities/chores/goals as stated above... taco tuesday baby. -- ct

02-07-02:  today i'm thinking a bit about topics/words such as 'free will', and 'self control', and... wait... TBC.  --  ct

02-06-02:  thinking about lot's of things over the past few days, not sure which of those things will motivate further research/digging, and which things will just get tucked away for future consideration... waking-up is a bit slow-going today, as i do so i may be able to articulate which things/ideas/information must be released... one can only consume a degree of information before output becomes a must... the longer i hold onto input without allowing for output the more apt i am to experience anxious and other emotions to an extent which can lead to actual health problems... there are many things that i want to write, but many ideas are still too incomplete to do so... there are many writing projects that remain open ideas, time will tell which ideas are pursued and completed, and which one's remain as open thoughts and ideas... i watched some good lectures and interviews over the past few days, here are links to some of them, and some links to media/posts from some other folks whose perspectives i appreciate:

* this intro is written by a friend of sorts on the Gab platform: 

'The 1hr Interview by Del Bigtree https://www.armstrongeconomics.com/armstrong-in-the-media/the-1hr-interview-by-del-bigtree/ The Armstrong interview starts at the 1hr mark. I can't encourage listening enough. This man needs to spread like wildfire. '

 ... i would recomend watching the entire episode, but if you want to skip to the part where the M Armstrong interview begins then skip to the middle

* This one was forwarded by another networked friend of sorts:  https://youtu.be/N02SK9yd60s

* And this one was written by someone who i consider a 'friendly', and is about as smart as a person can get:  https://gab.com/ChrisLangan/posts/107747655639614845

02-06-02 later:  OK, so i've been consuming a bunch of information from a few groups of very smart people, i don't claim to be one of them myself.  So in order to be a valid member of some of those groups i'm going to take one--or more--of those 'how smart are you' sorts of tests... frankly speaking i don't give a shit how smart or idiotic i officially am, because actual intelligence seems to be much more than things that some tests actually measure... anyways, i know that my math is weak once again, i had forgotten most of the fancy math that i learned some thirty years ago, and i'm not as fast as some tests expect folks to be... i think that pattern recognition and problem solving are strong, but i goofed-off and became more socially focused 'people-person' most of my life... and so i have a smaller vocabulary as many really smart folks have, and i need a dictionary to help explain some of the directions that the 'one in a million' tests asks from it's participants... i'll have to ask the smart folks which test/tests i should take, maintaining concentration during such tests is a battle within the battle... i call the testing a 'battle' because 'recalling' information when tests require me to do so can be a challenge, so testing in general is a battle of sorts... anyways, i might know if i'm officially smart in the near future, until then, i'm an ordinary average guy, and i'm OK with that... there is no shame for the genetics that were bestowed upon us... what we've done with our intelligence is another story all together, i've spent many a year squandering it on social acceptance, and trying to learn how to make a living, while forcing retardation from drinks and compounds that impair the mind and soul... so wish me luck on whichever tests i end up taking, i might just as well need it ;-)  --  ct

02-03-22:  today offered a change in recent routine, pleasant surprises, and a back that's hurting like ten sons-of-bitches... i haven't read much, just contemplated a few things in between some of the chores and events... i think i'm a bit distracted/per-occupied as i chew on some new information and things to consider... but today was a good day, but WTF did i do to my back, the combination of shoveling snow and carrying a heavy and torn sack of ice-melt (calcium chloride) for a bit of a distance are root-cause, but i think i overstretched the strained and tiny muscles which are screaming at me in some respects... i'm going to try a TENs/EMS device for a bit now... anyways, good day to you.  --  ct

02-02-22:  why did i do that to myself today... i finished-up one short book, and read a couple more today, in between chores and routines, and a movie... and now this seminar too, good grief... i wish the nice doctor presenting the seminar were speaking at eighty percent speed, or if youtube came with a dimmer-switch... i don't know if he drank a red-bull just prior to the presentation, or if he is speaking that fast by design as come sort of cognitive-hack, or if it's just him being him... i appreciate the info, but i think i had too much input today to follow along with this guy... but give this video some time and see if the content is of interest to you... i find it frightfully informative... and i sort of get most of it already, but the fact that it's at an operational stage is a bit worrisome and quite insidious...

... anyways, we shall comment further on the 'anthem' transcript when we read for a second time by means of the small glass globes with the metallic cobwebs lest the council of the scholars suffer the loss of more stolen candles... A Rand's book is good enough for another quick go-around... and Chris Langan's forward is a worthy book within the book in some respects...

... today's other books were more manuals than anything, and one of them was almost good, but neither worth mentioning...

... the movie was the bourne legacy... my advice to the reader, don't eat the yellow chems.  --  ct

02-01-22:  i started a new, and thankfully short, book yesterday.  yesterday was still part of january, and on this simple little website and folder i use a new webpage to follow the months of the astrological/western calendar... since i started a new topic in january and continuing with that topic into february i figured it was worth repeating the bulk of yesterday's last post to help expand/continue the thought:

... oh, i also read about halfway through a book, have you ever read 'Anthem'... anyways, i never had... i'm reading the one that has the forward written by Chris Langan, which added some good ballast to the author's story... Ayn Rand is a brilliant writer, no matter what her ideologies and perspectives may be... that gal can write... i love how the subject refers to himself as 'we' and not 'i'... the whole story is great insight into the marxist society and collective herd... there is no i/individual, everything centers on the state/country collective... if that sounds like a good idea to you then maybe chew on this, no matter what your individual gift might be, you will be a bus-boy, not that there is anything wrong or bad about clearing tables for the rest of your productive years, but if you are interested in neuroscience/surgery and have the mental capacity for it, well you might think differently... i'll tell ya, communism is certainly an efficient philosophy and way of life for the uber-rich and other demented controllers, it really get's the jobs done, but the only incentive for the layman is self-preservation/survival... anyways, you have to read the book for yourself, i recommend the one with Langan's forward, it won't disappoint... i'll try to get through the second half tomorrow...

... so to continue with that thought i just wanted to share a bit of Ayn's writing:

"

'indeed you are happy,' they answered.  'how else can men be when they live for their brothers?'

and now sitting here in our tunnel, we wonder about these words.  it is forbidden, not to be happy.  for, as it has been explained to us, men are free and the earth belongs to them; and all things on earth belong to all men; and the will of all men together is good for all; and so all men must be happy.

"

the brilliance of the mind control utilized by marxist leaders TELLS the masses that they are 'free', yet they are only 'free' to do exactly what the controllers tell them they are to do, they strip identity/individualism and 'free will' and incentive from subservient 'telors', the individual may only express themselves/individualism if they are permitted to do so, you can't choose your own mate, because marxists control that too... anyways, i still have half the book to read, so pardon me as i do so.  --  ct